Cereal Quotes

“I married a damned cereal killer”
― Susan Elizabeth Phillips, Nobody's Baby But Mine

“Don't let the cereal eat you. It's only a fucking box of cereal, but it will eat you alive if you let it.”
― Kathleen Glasgow, Girl in Pieces

“Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals.”
― Robert Orben

“Jen's been hiding the sugary cereals behind the granola, so I forget we have them.
It's not a very nice thing to do.
Jen likes the granola that feels like crackling leaves.
I like cereal with taste as opposed to feelings.”
― Erynn Mangum, Latte Daze

“World-class cereal-eating is a dance of fine compromises. The giant heaping bowl of sodden cereal, awash in milk, is the mark of the novice. Ideally one wants the bone-dry cereal nuggets and the cryogenic milk to enter the mouth with minimal contact and for the entire reaction between them to take place in the mouth. Randy has worked out a set of mental blueprints for a special cereal-eating spoon that will have a tube running down the handle and a little pump for the milk, so that you can spoon dry cereal up out of a bowl, hit a button with your thumb, and squirt milk into the bowl of the spoon even as you are introducing it into your mouth. The next best thing is to work in small increments, putting only a small amount of Cap’n Crunch in your bowl at a time and eating it all up before it becomes a pit of loathsome slime, which, in the case of Cap’n Crunch, takes about thirty seconds.”
― Neal Stephenson, Cryptonomicon

“You don`t get mood swings from eating cornflakes”
― O.J. Simpson, If I Did It: Confessions of the Killer

“The next morning we experienced our very first “full English breakfast,” which consisted of tea, orange juice, cookies, oatmeal, granola, berries, bananas, croissants, grapes, pineapples, prunes, yogurt, five kinds of cold cereal, eggs, hash browns, back bacon, sausage, smoked salmon, tomatoes, mushrooms, beans, toast, butter, jam, jelly, and honey. I don’t know how the British do it.”
― Jared Brock, A Year of Living Prayerfully

“To eat in a monastery refectory is an exercise in humility; daily, one is reminded to put communal necessity before individual preference. While consumer culture speaks only to preferences, treating even whims as needs to be granted (and the sooner the better), monastics sense that this pandering to delusions of self-importance weakens the true self, and diminishes our ability to distinguish desires from needs. It's a price they're not willing to pay.”
― Kathleen Norris, The Cloister Walk

“There's a little bit of magic in every box!”
― Adam Rex, Cold Cereal

“Some candy bars had more protein than many cereals. [Jean] Mayer dubbed them "sugar-coated vitamin pills" and wrote, "I contend that these cereals containing over 50% sugar should be labeled imitation cereal or cereal confections, and they should be sold in the candy section rather than in the cereal section.”
― Michael Moss, Salt Sugar Fat: How the Food Giants Hooked Us

“No wonder it seems like someone shit in his cereal.”
― Michael Kilman, Upon Stilted Cities: The Winds of Change

“Why is a bowl of frosted cereal loops with added rainbow marshmallows allowed to count as ‘breakfast’ and not ‘sweets’?”
― Bee Wilson, First Bite: How We Learn to Eat

“The smiling clerks at the various shops confused them a little at first by offering them new brands of breakfast foods with strange, oddly spelled names, but the girls explained patiently at each place that they were giving a dinner party, not a breakfast, and that they wanted nothing but the things on their list.”
― Carroll Watson Rankin, Dandelion Cottage

“It just makes me want to puke, Vic. I see that guy sitting on his desk and looking out at me like butter wouldn't melt in his mouth, taking a big bit of that cereal with the runny dye in it and saying, 'Nope, nothing wrong here,' and I get sick to my stomach. Physically sick to my stomach. I'm glad the projectionist had to go. If I watched them one more time, I'd have to do it with an airsick bag in my lap.”
― Stephen King, Cujo

“I was a lazy reader as a kid. One nutrition label on a box of Cap’n Crunch and I’d have to take a nap.”
― M.J. McGuire, Meme Myself and Jesus

“So are we going to eat some Boo Berry or what?" John said, leaping out of his seat and toward the refrigerator.”
― Eric Spitznagel, Old Records Never Die: One Man's Quest for His Vinyl and His Past

“It's like a blueberry White Russian,' John said, now on his third spoonful.
'It tastes exactly the same,' Mike said, his teeth already bright blue.
'No, no, it tastes better,' John said. 'I feel like it's making me stronger.”
― Eric Spitznagel, Old Records Never Die: One Man's Quest for His Vinyl and His Past

“He tilted the box toward a chipped Pottery Barn blue bowl, and the little blue clumps, like cerulean rat turds, tumbled out, hitting the porcelain with a surprisingly metallic thud. It sounded like pennies dumped into an aluminum trash can.”
― Eric Spitznagel, Old Records Never Die: One Man's Quest for His Vinyl and His Past

“Cereal is a medium through which we learn to confuse hunger with marketing.”
― Bee Wilson, First Bite: How We Learn to Eat

“The cereals marketed for children are consistently the most sugary and highly processed in the whole cereal aisle.”
― Bee Wilson, First Bite: How We Learn to Eat

“The hippies became another corporate avatar, another mascot selling sugary cereal instead of free love.”
― Thomm Quackenbush, Holidays with Bigfoot

“... so if you like to vomit, try SICKOS. So good, you can't hold 'em down!”
― Alan Grant

“Please tell me we have more Lucky Charms… I’m in need of the kind of comfort only freeze-dried marshmallows can provide.”
― Nyla K., For the Fans

“He had such a crisp mind - it reminded me of cereal before you pour the milk in. For several months all the minds available to me had been like cereal about two hours after you pour the milk in.”
― Larry McMurtry, Somebody's Darling

“For my breakfast in the morning, I always make sure to have a large bowl of rocks and milk. That's why they call me "the Rock.”
― Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson