Chips!!!!

“Opening his eyes, Shane searched the darkness. Where was he? It didn’t take long to realize this wasn’t his bed—he couldn’t be at home. He lay on cold, hard concrete in a puddle of water. Confusion and disorientation caused a surge of panic to boil through him. And then he noticed he was curled around a warm body. Silky hair tickled his nose, smelling faintly of roses and lavender.”
― N.W. Harris, The Last Orphans

“Q: What are the hottest days during summer? A: Sundays! Q: What dog can tell time? A: A watch dog! Q: Why did the man shoot the clock? A: He wanted to kill some time! Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? A: Time to get a new car!”
― Johnny B. Laughing, LOL: Funny Jokes and Riddles for Kids

“She stood there for a second. One horrifying second. Then she let out a scream. THE END”
― W.J. May, School of Potential

“He reached out to snag the sword only to have Jason bitch slap his hand away with the fried dough. “My sword!” “Jerk,” Mitch mumbled as he eyed the sword. Jason looked thoughtfully down at his sword as well and took another bite. “We could always go win another one and have a sword fight.” “Sweet!” Mitch said. Yeah, they were big”
― R.L. Mathewson, Playing for Keeps