Philip

“and let's face it, the French Army couldn't beat a girls hockey team”
― Bill Bryson, Neither Here nor There: Travels in Europe

“He also administered the school's corporal punishment known as The Wacks - which I was told, involved being hit with a big gym shoe made heftier by a kitchen weight wedged in the toe. The gym shoes name was Charlie. It is surely one of the world's greatest sadnesess that billions of shoes go about their benevolent businesses in aid of mankind, day after day, protecting feet providing warmth and support, unselfishly getting ducked in puddles, smeared in dog shit and yet remained unnamed. Whereas this nasty cunt of a show got lavished with affection like a pet.”
― David Mitchell

“This is a unique scandal in Italian football history - with Juventus as the victims of an injustice.”
― John Foot, Calcio: A History of Italian Football

“Buddy hugged his father,and promptly, with a dreadful brightness, came over to me and held out his had.I shook it. It felt fat and moist.”
― Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar