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“Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry.”
― Janet Evanovich

“He [Ranger] stopped in front of my parents' house, and we both looked to the door. My mother and my grandmother were standing there, watching us.
"I'm not sure I feel comfortable about the way your grandma looks at me," Ranger said.
[Stephanie] "She wants to see you naked."
"I wish you hadn't told me that, babe."
"Everyone I know wants to see you naked."
"And you?"
"Never crossed my mind." I held my breath when I said it, and I hoped God wouldn't stike me down dead for lying.”
― Janet Evanovich, Hard Eight

“The golden years are for pussies. We went straight to brass.”
― Janet Evanovich, Fearless Fourteen

“So yes, I say things I regret constantly, and I just can't help it.”
― Kathy Griffin