Susan
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The Shots You Take
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"Greg Boudreaux is the narrator??? Now I have to do the audio. That man is a god." Mar 02, 2026 07:55PM

 
The Killer Instinct
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T.J. Klune
“I’m a dragon, and maybe if you’re lucky, I’ll be dragon my balls across your face later.”
T.J. Klune, The Lightning-Struck Heart

T.J. Klune
“Look. This has been… fun.” Lie. This had been nerve-racking and I needed to go masturbate. “But I have to go. I’ve got stuff to do before I head out again.” Masturbate. “Wizard stuff. Like… secret wizard stuff.” Masturbate.”
T.J. Klune, The Lightning-Struck Heart
tags: sam

T.J. Klune
“Gary, why Sam sweating?”
“Well you see, my dear Tiggy. When a boy loves another boy very much, it makes him awkward and have feelings in his penis and mmmphh!”
“Sam, why you use magic and glue Gary’s mouth shut?”
“Is that what that was? Gosh! I just thought I was singing to myself!”
MMMMPH!”
T.J. Klune, The Lightning-Struck Heart

T.J. Klune
“You know what they say, once you go dragon, all the rest is just laggin’.”
“No one says that,” I said. “Absolutely no one.”
T.J. Klune, The Lightning-Struck Heart

T.J. Klune
“Or not,” I said as I ground my teeth. “I like to masticate by myself.” “And you’re so good at it,” Gary said. “The up and down motions of your… jaw. And then, upon completion, you swallow. Right, Sam? You swallow, don’t you?” “Of course I do,” I said, confused. What the hell were we talking about now? “I always swallow when I finish. What am I supposed to do? Spit it back out?”
T.J. Klune, The Lightning-Struck Heart

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