shanthi
https://www.goodreads.com/shanteaparty
“I tell myself that I want to live a happy life, and that the circumstances for happiness just haven't arisen. But what if that's not true? What if I'm the one who can't let myself be happy? Because I'm scared, or I prefer to wallow in self-pity, or I don't believe I deserve good things, or some other reason. Whenever something good happens to me I always find myself thinking: I wonder how long it will be until this turns out badly. And I almost want the worst to happen sooner, sooner rather than later, and if possibile straight away, so at least I don't have to feel anxious about it anymore.”
― Beautiful World, Where Are You
― Beautiful World, Where Are You
“We don't have a plan, we just do our best to get through the day, because there'll be another one coming along tomorrow.”
― Anxious People
― Anxious People
“Was it ever real? The way we felt about another person? Or was it always a projection of something we needed or wanted regardless of them?”
― The Pisces
― The Pisces
“They say that a person’s personality is the sum of their experiences. But that isn’t true, at least not entirely, because if our past was all that defined us, we’d never be able to put up with ourselves. We need to be allowed to convince ourselves that we’re more than the mistakes we made yesterday. That we are all of our next choices, too, all of our tomorrows.”
― Anxious People
― Anxious People
“Did anyone ever say that life was to be enjoyed and not suffered? What if the suffering was the point? But I didn't want to suffer anymore. I couldn't take it. That was clear. So I was going to try to be happy, even if it brought me more suffering.”
― The Pisces
― The Pisces
shanthi’s 2025 Year in Books
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