B*tchy

“Black people have seen the worst of America, yet, somehow, we still believe in its best.”
― Nikole Hannah-Jones, The 1619 Project: A New Origin Story

“How can I create a helping relationship?

1) Can I be in some way that will be perceived by the other as trustworthy, dependable or consistent in some deep sense?
2) Can I be expressive enough as a person, that what I am will be communicated unambiguously?
3) Can I let myself experience positive emotions towards this person-attitudes of warmth, caring, liking, interest and respect?
4) Can I be strong enough as a person to be separate from the other? Can I be a sturdy respecter of my own needs and feelings as well as his?
5) Am I secure enough within myself to permit him, him separateness? Can I give him freedom to be or do I feel he should follow my advice, remain somewhat dependent on me or become a mold of me?
6) Can I allow myself to enter fully into the world of his feelings, personal meanings and see things as he does?
7) Can I be accepting of each facet of this other person
8) Can I act with sufficient sensitivity in the relationship, that my behaviour won't be seen as a threat?
9) Can I free him from the threat of external evaluation?
10) Can I meet this individual as a person who is in the process of becoming, or will I be bound by his past and my past?”
― Carl R. Rogers

“Changing our minds about things, especially deeply held personal and societal beliefs, is really hard. We live in a society that encourages firm and solidified opinions and values. We tend to set our opinions in stone and place them on our shelves as symbols of who we are. The problem with this is that stones can easily become idols. We attack people who change their minds, calling them a "flip flopper" and "inconsistent." Instead, we should honor and respect people who look at information and willing to learn and say, "Maybe I was wrong about this" instead of doubling down on an opinion simply because it's the one they've always held.”
― Taylor S. Schumann, When Thoughts and Prayers Aren't Enough: A Shooting Survivor's Journey into the Realities of Gun Violence

“Given the choice between parity with Black people—by inviting them into unified unions—and poverty, white workers chose poverty, spoiling the development of a multiracial mass labor movement in America.”
― Nikole Hannah-Jones, The 1619 Project: A New Origin Story