Serena Calcagno

“High school taught me a valuable lesson about glasses: Don't wear them. Contacts have always seemed like too much work, so instead I just squint, figuring that if something is more than ten feet away, I'll just deal with it when I get there.”
― David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“I needed to temper (my dad's) enthusiasm a bit (about attending Princeton), and so I announced that I would be majoring in patricide...My mom was actually jealous.”
― David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“Like anyone nostalgic for a time he didn't live through, I chose to weed out the little inconveniences: polio, say, or the thought of eating stewed squirrel. The world was simply grander back then, somehow more civilized, and nicer to look at.”
― David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames

“It is funny the things that run through your mind when you're sitting in your underpants in front of a pair of strangers.”
― David Sedaris, When You Are Engulfed in Flames