Status Updates From Story of My Life (Story Lak...

“Is this where you take all the girls to murder them and throw their bodies in the lake?” I asked. Cam reached over and retrieved the beer and food. “Only one way to find out.” It was a good thing I was hungry enough to gnaw off my own arm because I doubted anything else would have gotten me out of the truck. Muttering every creative obscenity I could think of under my breath, I shoved my door open.

“…The worst thing that ever happened to you is still the worst thing that ever happened to you. You don’t have to feel guilty that something even worse didn’t happen. That’s really fuckin’ stupid.”

“Nobody likes a romance novel heroine with no libido,” I muttered to myself. “What was that?” Gage asked, looking at me like he actually expected me to repeat myself. Oops. Right. I had actual humans in my house. I didn’t get to just shuffle around and mutter things out loud anymore. That would take some getting used to. “Er, nothing,” I croaked.

“Okay, but try not to accidentally drop-kick any babies on your way out,” she warned, firing finger guns at me. I clamped a hand over her mouth and looked over my shoulder. “Zoey, I’m begging you to shut up before you start a new rumor so I can enjoy my five minutes of not being hated.” She wriggled out of my grip. “Fair point…”