Status Updates From The Next Alpha

" Both of her breasts swam out and deflated against her thin chest." How is this considered sexy?

"The accusation hit home, and he sat down on the couch and planted his hands between his head." That's some talent he's got there......

"With eager and tempered balance he found the fallen cedar tree across the creek that he had used to cross it and carefully walked across it, his boots holding on the slick bark." This sentence alone indicates an author who cannot entrap the audience into the bliss of fantasy. I am not impressed.

The first three pages hold more grammatical mistakes than the entire book I just finished. Does not bode well for the rest.