Status Updates From Lone Star Ex-Con (Saddle Cr...

Bouquet of Texas wildflowers: bluebonnets, Indian blankets, Mexican hats, buttercups, wine cups, Indian paintbrushes

I can see her shear bra …

Sheer?

What dusty old Victorian home doesn’t have a library?

“If you lay a hand on my sister” - his hand goes to the gun at his belt - “it will be a justifiable homicide.”

You do know that her brother is the sheriff and that he’ll $h!t a monkey when he finds out you two are getting hitched?

No house that’s over a hundred years old has enough bathrooms.

(Aurora) Rory to Callie: How are you this shy at 35?

Callie is nearly a decade older than Monroe.

Callie’s hip got messed up by the same car accident that killed her parents.

She is 6 years older than Monroe’s older brother. Her brother is Sheriff Caleb Burton.

Nothing like time in prison to think about all the blood on my hands.

I think you got hit. I’m pretty sure my shoes are covered in rabbit poo, but I’m sorry about your jeans.

Don’t worry about it, Buttons. It’s not the first time an animal has $h!t on me. Probably won’t be the last.

Dwayne Ulysses Dillard. That poor kid - they gave him the initials DUD

Those eyes that can’t quite decide if they’re green or brown …

Callie: I’m a thirty-five-year-old nearsighted librarian with a limp* and too much jiggle in my wiggle. Meaning I’m on the other side of chubby.

*pelvis fractured @ age of nine

Johnny: I’m barely twenty-two. I have wild oats and such.

Madison: … no one wants to hear about your oats, so just keep them in your pants, will you?

Uncle Lewis is a more subtle form of evil. He’s conniving and manipulative, the kind of guy who will butter you up, grin, slap you in the shoulder, and then shiv you in the side before you have a chance to see the knife. Metaphorically speaking.

Like any small town, gossip in Saddle Creek is as popular as a church potluck.

Shiner Bock, the best beer in Texas, is brewed not that far from here …

~~~~~

When you’re out on parole, you don’t drink unless you want to end up back in prison.

It feels like a Texas honky-tonk, which is probably why it regularly makes whatever best-fill-in-the-blank-in-Texas list that Texas Monthly is peddling. Best chicken fried steak. Best burger. Best fries. Best arugula salad topped with locally-sourced artisanal goat cheese. Whatever foods trendy people care about, they serve it here, along with a hefty serving of Texas flavor.

It’s a restaurant that serves alcohol, not a bar. His parole is specifically about bars.

The Jolly Ranchers - that’s what sister Madison named the family text chain

I’ve never been the kind of guy who is good at following orders, even when they’re orders I give myself.

Monroe’s brothers and sister and he own & work a ranch just outside Saddle Creek, TX. Since cattle don’t give a $h!t about weekends, it’s a job that requires long days and staggered days off.

Callie feels that (Mon)Roe is “younger and way hotter than me.”