Joseph > Recent Status Updates

"Yea, he saw that their hearts were set upon gold, and upon silver, and upon all manner of fine goods."

What are you basing that on? Nothing they've said or did so far implies anything like that.

"Yea, he saw that their hearts were set upon gold, and upon silver, and upon all manner of fine goods."

What are you basing that on? Nothing they've said or done so far implies anything like that.

"Yea, he saw that their hearts were set upon gold, and upon silver, and upon all manner of fine goods."

What are you basing that on? Nothing they've said or did so far implies anything like that.

She frowned at Ana-Li. "Do you honestly think Livvy would come back here and drink your blood?"

She drank Bree's. Wasn't Bree her best friend? What makes Ana-Li so special?

From my experience with Stine's work, there's a legit chance that there actually IS a monster who did this.

"Great, more friends to keep track of."

Calling him "the Restorer" would make sense for some legendary figure who's been at this for years. It makes less sense when he discovered the cure for vampirism within the last six months, and everyone who knows about it also personally knows him.

Seriously, WHO calls him "the Restorer?" Apparently enough people that he can say "I am the Restorer" to Destiny and assume that she'll know what that means.

I was already thinking, they should have at least considered going to the hunter for help. They want to get rid of vampires; turning the girls human again achieves that.

For that matter, they should have gone to Coach Bauer, whom they know knows who the Restorer is.

Bitch should've read Animorphs, Tobias could tell you not to mess with an owl.

Anyway, you're a vampire bat. You're supposed to find a nice, sleepy cow, scrape a cut on its leg, and lick. Plenty of blood, very little risk.

I can only be so invested in this love triangle when all I remember about Ross is "the guy all the girls like" (a title he shares with Renz), and all I can remember about Courtney is "I'm pretty sure there's a character named Courtney in this story."

Why is Destiny shocked? Ari already kissed her before, after reacting positively to what seemed very much like you trying to give him a hickey. The fact that he's into you should not be a surprise at this point.

Didn't we already do this scene? Twice?

Why is Ari so horny? Is this how he tries to flirt?

This would be more dramatic if we hadn't seen that he was stalking her multiple times.

If Ari was a vampire hunter, I don't think he would keep it secret. Ten minutes after joining, it'd be posted on his Facebook.

Didn't we already do this scene?

I don't think you can just...pop an eye back in.

Honestly wondering if this book will acknowledge that supermarkers have security cameras.

"I've never read about a cure."

What are you talking about? "Kill the vampire who bit you" is an established trope in many pieces of media. It's in freaking Dracula!

Okay, I think Bauer is a vampire.

"Mrs. Bauer died of a heart attack. So why wasn't the casket open?"

Are the Bauers Jewish?

I feel like if Ari actually believes in vampires and is afraid that one is stalking the town, we shouldn't have been introduced to him joking around with a Dracula accent while raving about a shlocky vampire movie.

There are Amalekites in the New World now? How did they get there? Are they related to either Amaleki or Amulek? Does Joseph Smith just REALLY like how these letters sound together?

Also, a new Jerusalem. I mean, this was always Bible fanfic, but he's not even being subtle about it now.

Do the girls really need THIS many friends? I have a hard time imagining that all of these characters are going to be important.

Stine could have at least staggered them a bit.

Oh, wow. I am so excited to see this totally real vampire that this definitely is and not someone making a lame joke because R.L. Stine thinks he needs a "dramatic" chapter ending every five pages.

(Okay, to be fair, the chapters are a bit longer in this book.)

Does it occur to these guys that the king might punish them for making him lose his property?

Follow-up question: did it occur to Smith?

"Now they wept because of the fear of being slain. Now when Ammon saw this his heart was swollen within him with joy."

Nice guy, Ammon.

"And Alma and Amulek went forth preaching repentance to the people in their temples, and in their sanctuaries, and also in their synagogues, which were built after the manner of the Jews."

Why did the Jewish writer feel the need to state that the Jews whom he's writing about built their Jewish house of worship "after the manner of the Jews?" How else should it have been built, 78 years before Jesus was even born?

Oh, at some point Smith decided which Josephite tribe they're from. (Or possibly remembered which one was on those missing pages.)

I assume "Nina" is supposed to be "Mina."