Caleb Tate > Recent Status Updates

“When we are aware of our emotions and are able to share them with others, our daily lives are enriched because it is through the sharing of emotions that we deepen our connections with others.”

Three processes of integration:
Vertical integration - higher cerebral cortex combined with the lower, emotional, and motivational processing system.
Bilateral integration - left hemisphere (linear and logical) connects to right hemisphere (non linear emotional)
Temporal integration - Connecting processes across time through story integration

Stories then allow for interpersonal integration.

Creating an autobiographical story requires the cohesion of the left and right brain. Left brain is responsible for linear and logical information while the right brain is non-linear, emotional, and perceptual information.
Remaining in the left mode processing state recalls details but not emotional input. Both are required to make a cohesive narrative.

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We have implicit, explicit, and autobiographical memory. Implicit is automatic and does not have the sensation of a memory being retrieved. In relational contexts where feelings or intense emotions that are experienced that dont have a clear origin is being remembered implicitly. This shows the importance of creating a more cohesive narrative about your internal experiences to make the memories explicit.

The idea of drama triangles (person A goes to person C about the ways person B has hurt them instead of going to person B first) is parallel to triangulation within a family system. In fact, drama triangles are often learned first in the family.
With spiritual abuse, McBride claims that these systems relieve inner conflict dynamics by being the rescuer in the triangle, placing you to be victim and persecutor

Healthy self-regulatory processes are only internalized after YEARS of first experiencing it in relationship.

That is sobering

“Trauma is not suffering; trauma is what is insufferable”
- Preston Hill

“high control religious communities often use the language of ‘family’ to exploit trust and engender a closeness and a kinship that haven’t been earned.”

The center for abusive systems is control. In psychological control, it is through the praising of blind faith and submission as well as the cursing of critical thinking.

Control is maintained through consequences, forced compliance, and a grooming towards codependence within the spiritual context.