Wouter van Noort’s Reviews > The Throne of Fire > Status Update
Wouter van Noort
is 40% done
I understand, Carter. I do. Have me narrate the most painful part. Of course, I can't blame you. What happened was awful enough for me, but for you - well, I wouldn't want to talk about it either.
— 12 hours, 4 min ago
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Wouter’s Previous Updates
Wouter van Noort
is 57% done
Yes, Carter, the whole business with the water demons must've been horrible. But I feel no sympathy for you, as 1) you brought that trip entirely on yourself, and 2) while you were rescuing Zia, I was dealing with camels. Camels are disgusting.
— 3 hours, 15 min ago
Wouter van Noort
is 48% done
At this point, I should change my secret name to Embarrassed to Death by Sister, because that pretty much sums up my existence.
— 7 hours, 30 min ago
Wouter van Noort
is 29% done
Well, you talked long enough, brother dear. As you've been babbling on, everyone's been imagining me frozen in the doorway of Gran and Gramps's flat, screaming "AАННННН!"
— 22 hours, 40 min ago
Wouter van Noort
is 21% done
Thanks a lot, Sadie. Hand me the mic right when you get to a good part. The world was ending in four days, we had a quest to complete, and she goes off to party with her friends. Really had her priorities straight, huh? Not that I was bitter, or anything.
— May 11, 2026 08:26AM
Wouter van Noort
is 13% done
Carter here. Look, we don't have time for long introductions. I need to tell this story quickly, or we're all going to die.
— May 11, 2026 02:56AM
Wouter van Noort
is 6% done
If you didn't listen to our first recording, well... pleased to meet you: the Egyptian gods are running around loose in the modern world; a bunch of magicians called the House of Life is trying to stop them; everyone hates Sadie and me; and a big snake is about to swallow the sun and destroy the world.
— May 10, 2026 03:25PM
