Ms. Smartarse’s Reviews > Between > Status Update
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 851 of 1018
"Why did you not tell her about the wonders of Between? The mountains--"
"Filled with wraith wolfs."
"-- the lakes --"
"Filled with flesh-eating fish."
"-- the fields of flowers --"
"Mostly poisonous."
"-- and the wondrous creatures?"
Right on cue, thunder boomed right beside the tower. It was answered by the roar of a blue and orange winged beast as it flew past the window in all of its dreadful glory.
— Jun 09, 2026 01:07PM
"Filled with wraith wolfs."
"-- the lakes --"
"Filled with flesh-eating fish."
"-- the fields of flowers --"
"Mostly poisonous."
"-- and the wondrous creatures?"
Right on cue, thunder boomed right beside the tower. It was answered by the roar of a blue and orange winged beast as it flew past the window in all of its dreadful glory.
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Ms. Smartarse’s Previous Updates
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 923 of 1018
"Prepare a list of tasks that must be performed, and we shall delegate them to the ministers, the Heads, and some of the more competent castle guards. Perhaps if we give everyone a single task, they will not make a complete mess of it.”
Maddox looked at Lorn disapprovingly. “That sounds dangerously close to optimism.”
“I prefer to think of it as delusion.”
— Jun 10, 2026 08:34AM
Maddox looked at Lorn disapprovingly. “That sounds dangerously close to optimism.”
“I prefer to think of it as delusion.”
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 743 of 1018
"At first, you were angry about your Destiny... then whiny about your Destiny... then scheming about your Destiny... and now elf-ish about your Destiny."
"I prefer the term resigned - it contains fewer elves."
— Jun 08, 2026 02:17PM
"I prefer the term resigned - it contains fewer elves."
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 653 of 1018
"The citizens of Between are also quite pleased that you won; there have been raucous celebrations at the Sleazy Weasel all afternoon. The house band has already commemorated your exploits in a new song.”
Lorn looked up from his paperwork. “Is it terrible?”
“It contains a sixteen minute, improvised yodelling solo.”
“I shall take that as a resounding yes.”
— Jun 08, 2026 03:38AM
Lorn looked up from his paperwork. “Is it terrible?”
“It contains a sixteen minute, improvised yodelling solo.”
“I shall take that as a resounding yes.”
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 528 of 1018
“Take that prince in Snow White: he was riding around, kissing dead girls in forests. That’s not romantic—that’s necrophilia. Plus, she was 14, remember? He was a pedophilic necrophiliac. Come to think of it, the prince in Sleeping Beauty wasn’t that much better. I mean, who kisses a woman in a coma? That’s assault! Not cool, Prince Charming. Not cool ...”
“Wow, thank you for ruining those stories for me.”
— Jun 07, 2026 04:54AM
“Wow, thank you for ruining those stories for me.”
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 452 of 1018
"Passages that linked our realm to Otherworld were scattered across every country and continent.”
“Like subway stations,” Mrs. Landshome piped up. She winked at Lyla. “I thought you New Yorkers would appreciate the reference.”
Lyla grinned at the old woman. “Thanks for keeping this at my level.”
— Jun 06, 2026 10:46PM
“Like subway stations,” Mrs. Landshome piped up. She winked at Lyla. “I thought you New Yorkers would appreciate the reference.”
Lyla grinned at the old woman. “Thanks for keeping this at my level.”
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 313 of 1018
“Right,” she said reluctantly. “Marriage. Please, don’t take offense—”
“People always say that just before they are about to be particularly offensive.”
Sasha opened her mouth to refute his statement but then changed her mind. “You’re right. Please feel free to be offended.”
— Jun 06, 2026 05:38AM
“People always say that just before they are about to be particularly offensive.”
Sasha opened her mouth to refute his statement but then changed her mind. “You’re right. Please feel free to be offended.”
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 236 of 1018
Lyla frowned at the pantomime. “You can’t tell us what’s going on… because your ear is crusty?”
Sasha stared at Lyla incredulously. “Really? Really?”
Lyla held up her hands in surrender. “You know how much I hate both mimes and games, and what Rosa did just then was a terrible combination of both. So ‘crusty ear’ was a pretty solid effort on my part.”
— Jun 04, 2026 01:58PM
Sasha stared at Lyla incredulously. “Really? Really?”
Lyla held up her hands in surrender. “You know how much I hate both mimes and games, and what Rosa did just then was a terrible combination of both. So ‘crusty ear’ was a pretty solid effort on my part.”
Ms. Smartarse
is on page 105 of 1018
-- you owe me. Your next substitute teaching position had better be in a place where men outnumber women two hundred to one, and the Internet speed is off the charts. Which, now that I think of it, is probably Silicon Valley. Do they need substitute teachers in Silicon Valley? Or are all the classes taught by robots?
— Jun 01, 2026 10:52AM
