Zana’s Reviews > The Odyssey > Status Update

‘“Stranger! Are you still here, still causing trouble, with begging and annoying those inside? I promise you a beating if you stay! Your begging is not welcome! This is not the only place in Greece where there is food.”’

These goddamn goat herders... WTF is their issue???

‘And then Melantho scolded Odysseus again. “Hey! Stranger! Will you keep causing trouble, roaming round our house at night and spying on us women here? Get out, you tramp! Be happy with your meal! Or you will soon get pelted with a torch! Be off!”’

We got slaves shitting on homeless people too damn

Bro why are the beggars (Odysseus in disguise and an actual beggar) fighting while the suitors are goading them on??? 😭😭 It's giving UFC match on the white house lawn

‘Antinous said, “Haha, you big show-off! You would be better dead than so afraid of some old man worn down by suffering. If this man beats you, proving he is stronger, I will toss you on board a ship and send you off to King Echetus in mainland Greece, the lord of cruelty and pain. He will cut off your nose and ears with pitiless bronze, and then your genitals, and he will give them raw to his dogs to eat.”’

Bro???

‘Sharp-witted Odysseus drew back from him and said, “You handsome idiot! You would not give a grain of salt from your own house. You sit enjoying someone else’s food, and yet you will not give a crumb from this great banquet to me.” Antinous was furious, and scowling said, “That does it! You insult me? You lost the chance to leave with dignity!” He lifted up his stool and hurled it at Odysseus’ right shoulder...’ omg

‘Antinous replied, “What god imposed this pest to spoil our feast? Stay over there, not near my table—or you can get lost! Get killed in Egypt or enslaved in Cyprus! You barefaced beggar! You come up to us, 450 and these men give you treats unthinkingly; we have so much, and people do not mind sharing another person’s wealth.”’

👁️👄👁️

“Twenty years had passed since Argos saw Odysseus, and now he saw him for the final time— then suddenly, black death took hold of him.”

Argos babyyyyy 😭🐕

“The master gone, boys took the puppy out to hunt wild goats and deer and hares. But now he lay neglected, without an owner, in a pile of dung from mules and cows—the slaves stored heaps of it outside the door, until they fertilized the large estate. So Argos lay there dirty, covered with fleas.”

Argos nooooo 😭😭

‘“One scoundrel leads another! Makes sense: gods join like things with like. You foul pig-man, where are you taking this old swine? A scrounger, who will rub on many doors, demanding scraps, not gifts for warriors. ... But he does not want work....”’

This random goat herder is out here hating for the love of the game. Poor Eumaeus. I almost feel bad for Odysseus too which is giving me the ick lmao

“And in my father’s house there was a woman from Phoenicia—tall and beautiful and skilled in many arts. Those clever rascals tricked her. One of them first found her washing clothes beside the ship and lay with her. Sex sways all women’s minds, even the best of them.”

👁️👄👁️