Sofie’s Reviews > The Case Study of Vanitas, Vol. 4 > Status Update

what a beautifully drawn and written bow for this arc. there is an undeniable level of trust between vanitas and noé that was not there before, and noé has uncovered one of the key pieces of vanitas' story. not through seeing his memories via blood but through what vanitas himself was willing to reveal and then noé making his own connections from there. they've climbed from shadow to light, and they did it together

what if our love was so strong that it shook the very foundations of a man's faith and also what if we were both boys

(cont.)
it reminds me of when he burst into laughter after the first encounter with luca and jeanne, but noé didn't understand him back then, nor was he involved in the crazy plan (any more than just being a pawn) that made vanitas feel so exhilarated in the first place. but now they're aligned in their experiences and feelings and can share in the comedown together. why ARE they alive? it's a joint question now

vanitas saying "i have no idea WHY we're still alive" instead of the more intuitive "how" is interesting. noé did just ask him a different "why" before they jumped into the shadow, and it's clear that being confronted with his past has brought those existential thoughts to the forefront even more so than usual. so for him to call out the utter absurdity of it all and LAUGH ABOUT IT so genuinely?????? (cont.)

and that panel of the book as vanitas is struggling to find the answer??? that book IS the answer in a lot of ways, especially to the "what" of it all. it's his burden but also his purpose, his salvation and his downfall. so for his victorious moment to first be shown through him grabbing hold of the chain is SO satisfying. he is NOT letting the shadows of his past consume him. he holds the chain, he is in control

(cont.)
and that last bit could easily extend to vanitas' life in general, not just this specific mission. why are you still holding on anyway? why are you still fighting when you're on borrowed time and you've suffered through all of it? show me that fight, that stubbornness, that desperation, that complicated vengeance, that contradictory desire for understanding and connection. what are you? why do you persist?

"what are you?" "why are you here, even though you had to go through so much pain to get here?"
the repetition of "what are you" from their very first meeting and now, noé actually has a better idea of the answer and is using it to give vanitas the motivation he needs
and very directly acknowledging the pain???? "i see how hard you're fighting, how much this quest means to you, how good it is (and you are)" (cont.)

continuing with the metaphor, i do not think it's a fucking coincidence that in order to cure this cursebearer, noé and vanitas have to dive straight into the shadow and find the suffering vampire within. AND it's a solution that they could've only thought of and executed as a duo. the first time they are really, truly working together involves diving into darkness and pulling someone out of it. the layers...........

this spread is so fantastic i can't get over how much noé looks like a hero, an angel, a savior. and vanitas is looking up at him like he's all of those things

this moment. in the context of the previously mentioned metaphor. the layers......
vanitas is ready to give up and bear the weight of losing one person in order to save the majority (and it's a weight that clearly would be felt, he doesn't make the decision lightly) bc his own self-hatred and feelings of inadequacy (HIS SHADOW) are blinding him to other potential solutions (cont.)