Vanessa’s Reviews > Alexander > Status Update

We will find Alexander's corpse soon. He has been spinning in his grave since the release of this book. His corpse will be free soon to conquer us all again.

Alexander the Great actually wanted to live peacefully with his "partner" on the countryside.

THOSE MACEDONIAN SOLDIERS HE HAD MARCHING ACROSS HALF THE KNOWN WORLD FOR HIS AMBITION DIDN'T DIE FOR THIS SLANDER!!!

Too sexually pent up to think about a way to untie that "stupid knot". Orgasms lead to the best ideas. It is known.

(I am a gross puddle on the floor. I have melted.)

THIS ALEXANDER DOESN'T WANT TO USE VIOLENCE TO CONQUER THE WORLD

someone fetch me some smelling salts

Alexander the Great. Sweetie. I'm so sorry.

Alexander the Great not caring about military stuff because he's too busy oogling his "partner"...
...
...
...
Let me write my testament real quick.

Not Barsine telling Olympias - and I quote - that her son "dicked her down so good"

My eyes are wide. My mouth agape. My brain is scrambled.

"Will you be my partner?"

"Only if you will be mine."

"Deal."

SOMEONE SEDATE ME

Alexander called Hephaestion: "Baby"

I... I... just... asdfgghhjkl

HEPHAESTION CALLED BARSINE ALEXANDER'S "SIDEPIECE" BWAHAHAHAHAHA (sob sob sob)