Debra Smouse's Blog - Posts Tagged "carl-jung"
August 2021: on Awareness
I saw my first bright yellow school bus this week. I saw the first sunflower, standing out against a field of green. We’re still weeks and weeks away from the first day of Autumn, I’ve noticed the sun is setting just a little earlier each evening....
We're in the season for transitions and new beginnings.
On Wednesday evening, I wrapped a very full day of writing and coaching wonderful people, poured a glass of Rose, and wandered outside with my book. The sun was shining, a soft breeze was blowing and I was overwhelmed with gratitude.
For most of my life, I believed that in order for life to be interesting , then that meant life had to be more downs than ups and fill with all kinds of angst (and other such nonsense). That we had to rush around to prove our worth and relaxing was for those "privileged people".
Well, baby, I'm here to tell you that though life is a glorious adventure, living a daily life you love includes lots of peaceful moment. That, at the end of the day, I don't have to rush around like a crazy person - I can actually relax and enjoy my home, a good book and an excellent glass of wine - sans drama.
I can't tell your how incredible that feels to a once-upon-a-time drama queen. Or, how contrary that is to what I was taught growing up.
I'm living proof that we don't have to follow in path of what we grew up believing. We get to choose our path and alter it to be experience in a way that feels loving and nourishing.
But I mentioned that all around us are signs of shifts. Even for folks who don’t have kids, August is one of those transitional months where we get that “back to school” energy.
It’s a restart, the edges of the fall, the longing to complete a 2021 goal, and looking to the new year.
Though the new year doesn't arrive for four and a half more months, we've shifted into Next Year Thinking at our house.
JB's work uses a fiscal year calendar that begins October 1st, and their class - and travel - schedules are beginning to emerge. (Though, of course, we don't know about the travel portion).
So during my morning porch time, when I sit with my coffee and journal, I'm pondering what's on the horizon while savoring the goodness in my present.
It’s also when I begin not just my personal planning and household planning around his work commitments, I’m pondering what business goals I want to set…and frankly, what areas of my business need to shift. And what needs to change about ME so that I can better tend all the areas of my life?
Here's what I'm pondering lately:
--Is the blog still a good use of my time? Do people even read blogs in 2021?
--Is it time to rework my coaching packages? Though I have always loved working long term with clients which allows us to go deeper and deeper into their desires and growth, I would be lying if I didn’t admit how much I love doing strategy sessions with folks. You know, where someone presents a problem or challenge and we brainstorm all the ways to address it. And then create a plan. That’s super fun – and useful.
--I’m thinking a lot about my creative time. Is it time to finally finish that book that’s 90% complete so I can release it into the world? Or should I create – or revamp – some of my courses and breath new life into them?
--Social media is often on my mind when it comes to my professional life….as a coach and writer, is social media a good use of my time? Or is it all just noise anymore?
--And while we're thinking about social media, I'm wondering if it's good for me when it comes to my own mental health...
--How can I better tend my home without using it as an excuse not to write?
--What have I always wanted to do but held back from? Where are my own excuses getting in the way of loving myself and my life more?
--And, frankly, I’m thinking a lot about the future. Though I’m looking at the last four months or 2021 and ahead to 2022…I am also imagining a life where JB is retired and I am finding a balance of enjoying my time with him and doing a little work…
I share all the things I'm pondering because we're friends here. And pulling back the curtain on my process invites you to begin thinking about yourself and your life. Because while this can seem like minutia and a bit of naval gazing, it's about being open to possibility and digging into what I desire for the big picture of my life as well as the rhythm of my daily life.
All of this thinking and pondering is really about awareness.
When it comes to living a life you love, one of the first pieces of advice I give is to dive into your own self-awareness. Yes, even though it not always easy to look in the mirror and see who we are, warts and all. You may be asking why awareness, then, is worth the trouble. That’s because without awareness, you are cutting yourself off from the very tools you need to, not just pursue your desires, but enhance the quality of your everyday experiences
Self-awareness is the ability to observe ourselves – why we react and how we behave – and not only accept what we discover, but make informed decisions about the changes we want to make.
Awareness is also the ability to be honest with ourselves about our weaknesses and strengths, as well as our thoughts, motivations, and emotions.
Awareness often done through a personal inquiry process: asking yourself good questions and getting nakedly and brutally honest about your real answers. And trust me, even if you're not much of a journal keeper, it is so helpful to do this on paper. To ask yourself good questions, record your answers, and then ask yourself "Why?" and "And what would that give you?" several times until you get to your deeper truth.
Because you don’t know what you don’t know, even about yourself. This is something that I believe is critical work - especially right now.
Because even if you've done a ton of personal growth work in the past, not one of us is the same person we were before March 2020. It's just not possible to experience - or witness - so much chaos and worry and stress without it changing you.
The beauty of awareness is that it allows us to make better choices and curate a lifestyle that makes us feel engaged and alive.
Remember when we talked in June about idleness? From the outside, awareness can look an awful lot like idleness. And making the decision to dig in means that you may look idle on the outside....and your actual productivity for getting things done - such as laundry, errands, chores, and work that produces something tangible - is going to languish.
For me, personally, this means that less consumable content can be created because all my energy is going towards digging in. Because when you are asking yourself the harder questions around what you need and desire? All that brain work takes energy, time, and bandwidth.
As a still-reforming perfectionist, I often get into my head the idea that I should be able to do EVERYTHING. I am wired as a "J", which means I tend to see a lot of black and white in the world as my norm. It's sometimes hard to remember that I can't always BE and DO everything. To leave behind the idea that I should be able to do more work in a single day - coach more people, get more words on a page, not need quiet, not need company, and certainly never battle resistance.
So, darling, when you're choosing to live in the question and go deeper for your answers, be patient with the lack of exterior results. Because it's frustrating to reach the end of a day - or week - when you've done so much exhausting, inner work....but have nothing "productive" to show for it.
This is why I’m often asked if self-awareness is worth the trouble. Because there’s the shadow side of it.
This shadow side can make us angry or sad at our past choices, and can send us spiraling down the rabbit hole of the so-called “bad” emotions. And how can I forget the Inner Critic’s ability to become oh so judgmental when we play with being more aware of ourselves as our ally.
Let’s be honest, sometimes too much self-awareness can be downright exhausting. And no one enjoys digging into painful, old wounds and stories.
Yet, awareness, while sometimes a bit painful, is actually quite freeing. If we can pair the awareness with kindness towards ourselves, it gives us a great opportunity to step into our own greatness. To allow what could be seen as flaws or cracks in our perfect facades to burst open so that the light from our souls can shine.
Even when we deal with the painful side of awareness, it invites us to dream and go more deeply into our desires and wishes. Because, as my old pal Cinderella would say "A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes".
It's the most beautiful part of my work as a coach. To finally understand that when we step into our own awareness that life only gets sweeter. That we aren't made to be perfect. That our cracks don't indicate brokenness, but the ways in which we've been touched by the world and our existence in it.
Awareness is always worth the trouble. That’s because, without taking the time to observe how we feel about what we’re doing, seeing, or experiencing, it’s impossible to feel fully engaged. Or, as I have to remind myself regularly: when you plant new seeds, the first thing to come up is dirt. Yet, before anything can bloom, working through the dirt is necessary.
If you'd like to read the August 2021 love note in full, you can do so here.
And, if you'd like to receive my Monthly Love Note, sign up here. You'll also receive my BRAND NEW free E-Book - Create a Life You Love:
Standards Help Curate Delightful Days
That’s my wish and hope for you this month. That you find loving, gentle ways to deepen your own self-awareness. To dig more deeply into what you desire, what you need, and how you can make it happen.
For when you do, you're sure to recognize it as an opportunity to look around you and really love yourself and your life even more.
We're in the season for transitions and new beginnings.
On Wednesday evening, I wrapped a very full day of writing and coaching wonderful people, poured a glass of Rose, and wandered outside with my book. The sun was shining, a soft breeze was blowing and I was overwhelmed with gratitude.
For most of my life, I believed that in order for life to be interesting , then that meant life had to be more downs than ups and fill with all kinds of angst (and other such nonsense). That we had to rush around to prove our worth and relaxing was for those "privileged people".
Well, baby, I'm here to tell you that though life is a glorious adventure, living a daily life you love includes lots of peaceful moment. That, at the end of the day, I don't have to rush around like a crazy person - I can actually relax and enjoy my home, a good book and an excellent glass of wine - sans drama.
I can't tell your how incredible that feels to a once-upon-a-time drama queen. Or, how contrary that is to what I was taught growing up.
I'm living proof that we don't have to follow in path of what we grew up believing. We get to choose our path and alter it to be experience in a way that feels loving and nourishing.
But I mentioned that all around us are signs of shifts. Even for folks who don’t have kids, August is one of those transitional months where we get that “back to school” energy.
It’s a restart, the edges of the fall, the longing to complete a 2021 goal, and looking to the new year.
Though the new year doesn't arrive for four and a half more months, we've shifted into Next Year Thinking at our house.
JB's work uses a fiscal year calendar that begins October 1st, and their class - and travel - schedules are beginning to emerge. (Though, of course, we don't know about the travel portion).
So during my morning porch time, when I sit with my coffee and journal, I'm pondering what's on the horizon while savoring the goodness in my present.
It’s also when I begin not just my personal planning and household planning around his work commitments, I’m pondering what business goals I want to set…and frankly, what areas of my business need to shift. And what needs to change about ME so that I can better tend all the areas of my life?
Here's what I'm pondering lately:
--Is the blog still a good use of my time? Do people even read blogs in 2021?
--Is it time to rework my coaching packages? Though I have always loved working long term with clients which allows us to go deeper and deeper into their desires and growth, I would be lying if I didn’t admit how much I love doing strategy sessions with folks. You know, where someone presents a problem or challenge and we brainstorm all the ways to address it. And then create a plan. That’s super fun – and useful.
--I’m thinking a lot about my creative time. Is it time to finally finish that book that’s 90% complete so I can release it into the world? Or should I create – or revamp – some of my courses and breath new life into them?
--Social media is often on my mind when it comes to my professional life….as a coach and writer, is social media a good use of my time? Or is it all just noise anymore?
--And while we're thinking about social media, I'm wondering if it's good for me when it comes to my own mental health...
--How can I better tend my home without using it as an excuse not to write?
--What have I always wanted to do but held back from? Where are my own excuses getting in the way of loving myself and my life more?
--And, frankly, I’m thinking a lot about the future. Though I’m looking at the last four months or 2021 and ahead to 2022…I am also imagining a life where JB is retired and I am finding a balance of enjoying my time with him and doing a little work…
I share all the things I'm pondering because we're friends here. And pulling back the curtain on my process invites you to begin thinking about yourself and your life. Because while this can seem like minutia and a bit of naval gazing, it's about being open to possibility and digging into what I desire for the big picture of my life as well as the rhythm of my daily life.
All of this thinking and pondering is really about awareness.
When it comes to living a life you love, one of the first pieces of advice I give is to dive into your own self-awareness. Yes, even though it not always easy to look in the mirror and see who we are, warts and all. You may be asking why awareness, then, is worth the trouble. That’s because without awareness, you are cutting yourself off from the very tools you need to, not just pursue your desires, but enhance the quality of your everyday experiences
Self-awareness is the ability to observe ourselves – why we react and how we behave – and not only accept what we discover, but make informed decisions about the changes we want to make.
Awareness is also the ability to be honest with ourselves about our weaknesses and strengths, as well as our thoughts, motivations, and emotions.
Awareness often done through a personal inquiry process: asking yourself good questions and getting nakedly and brutally honest about your real answers. And trust me, even if you're not much of a journal keeper, it is so helpful to do this on paper. To ask yourself good questions, record your answers, and then ask yourself "Why?" and "And what would that give you?" several times until you get to your deeper truth.
Because you don’t know what you don’t know, even about yourself. This is something that I believe is critical work - especially right now.
Because even if you've done a ton of personal growth work in the past, not one of us is the same person we were before March 2020. It's just not possible to experience - or witness - so much chaos and worry and stress without it changing you.
The beauty of awareness is that it allows us to make better choices and curate a lifestyle that makes us feel engaged and alive.
Remember when we talked in June about idleness? From the outside, awareness can look an awful lot like idleness. And making the decision to dig in means that you may look idle on the outside....and your actual productivity for getting things done - such as laundry, errands, chores, and work that produces something tangible - is going to languish.
For me, personally, this means that less consumable content can be created because all my energy is going towards digging in. Because when you are asking yourself the harder questions around what you need and desire? All that brain work takes energy, time, and bandwidth.
As a still-reforming perfectionist, I often get into my head the idea that I should be able to do EVERYTHING. I am wired as a "J", which means I tend to see a lot of black and white in the world as my norm. It's sometimes hard to remember that I can't always BE and DO everything. To leave behind the idea that I should be able to do more work in a single day - coach more people, get more words on a page, not need quiet, not need company, and certainly never battle resistance.
So, darling, when you're choosing to live in the question and go deeper for your answers, be patient with the lack of exterior results. Because it's frustrating to reach the end of a day - or week - when you've done so much exhausting, inner work....but have nothing "productive" to show for it.
This is why I’m often asked if self-awareness is worth the trouble. Because there’s the shadow side of it.
This shadow side can make us angry or sad at our past choices, and can send us spiraling down the rabbit hole of the so-called “bad” emotions. And how can I forget the Inner Critic’s ability to become oh so judgmental when we play with being more aware of ourselves as our ally.
Let’s be honest, sometimes too much self-awareness can be downright exhausting. And no one enjoys digging into painful, old wounds and stories.
Yet, awareness, while sometimes a bit painful, is actually quite freeing. If we can pair the awareness with kindness towards ourselves, it gives us a great opportunity to step into our own greatness. To allow what could be seen as flaws or cracks in our perfect facades to burst open so that the light from our souls can shine.
Even when we deal with the painful side of awareness, it invites us to dream and go more deeply into our desires and wishes. Because, as my old pal Cinderella would say "A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes".
It's the most beautiful part of my work as a coach. To finally understand that when we step into our own awareness that life only gets sweeter. That we aren't made to be perfect. That our cracks don't indicate brokenness, but the ways in which we've been touched by the world and our existence in it.
Awareness is always worth the trouble. That’s because, without taking the time to observe how we feel about what we’re doing, seeing, or experiencing, it’s impossible to feel fully engaged. Or, as I have to remind myself regularly: when you plant new seeds, the first thing to come up is dirt. Yet, before anything can bloom, working through the dirt is necessary.
If you'd like to read the August 2021 love note in full, you can do so here.
And, if you'd like to receive my Monthly Love Note, sign up here. You'll also receive my BRAND NEW free E-Book - Create a Life You Love:
Standards Help Curate Delightful Days
That’s my wish and hope for you this month. That you find loving, gentle ways to deepen your own self-awareness. To dig more deeply into what you desire, what you need, and how you can make it happen.
For when you do, you're sure to recognize it as an opportunity to look around you and really love yourself and your life even more.
October 2021: on Everyday Magic
As I write this to you, it's more than an hour before sunrise. In one of my favorite mugs is a fresh cup of coffee - an unusual second cup that hints at the fact that I've been up since 4:30 this morning since I woke thinking of you and finishing this love note.
The house is almost silent save for the light strains of Mozart Piano Concerto No. 21 playing in the background. It's from my favorite playlist from Calm - Classical Piano. This simple, ordinary moment was so perfect and magical for me, I stopped to snap a photo to share with you in the newsletter. Messy desk and all. Because in this moment is exactly what I want to explore with you this month: seeing Magic in your life.
Now, I will share with you - because I value honesty - that the silence is something I've been craving all week. But, wow has been hard to come by! Despite being an extrovert, I have found the beauty in quiet. Especially when I'm writing.
Though I have gotten accustomed to the household sounds of JB working from home as well, this week was a bit beyond our norm. The painters have been here tackling things on my "Honey Do" list and they spent part of two days working in the garage which is right above my office. Said garage contents - save our cars and the snow blower - are occupying the living room and entry hall, giving me big doses of visual noise anytime I am upstairs.
Adding to the cacophony of sound are nearby homes getting new roofs, the golf course doing their (seemingly daily) mowing, and the city replacing all the curbs at every sidewalk exit.
I share this not to complain, but to share a big dose of reality...because in the chaos has been both beauty. And yes, tangible magic.
If you need to see magic with your own eyes, change the paint color somewhere in your home. It transforms a space in moments, doesn't it?
There are so many small aspects of daily, ordinary life that invite us to notice the beauty and magic.
Especially this time of year. I need but walk outside and glory in sunbeams, cool breezes, and brilliant color in the landscape to witness it.
And tending to our lives to make ordinary days more pleasant is a form of magic we can each touch, too. From home-cooked meals to fresh sheets on the bed every Friday to knowing there's a warm blanket to throw across my legs as I read in a favorite chair.
But in order to see this ordinary as magic, I have to look for it. It means I need to slow down and truly observe what's right here before me.
It's so much easier to get lost the busyness of tending life to see it, isn't there? To stressing out over the chaos in the living room and lose sight of the freshly painted garage. Or to get lost in all the noise from the workers doing their jobs as part of making people's homes and community safer and more beautiful and miss how the roses are giving me one more showing of brilliance before we have our first freeze.
Because it's human nature to focus on the worries, the distractions, and the stresses, we have to be reminded to look for what's shining through and underneath it all.
To make space for the magic of life.
Though my first exposure to the idea of magic came from fairy tales, what I believe in most deeply is that there is magic to be discovered in the everyday living.
We simply need to look for it, seek it, and choose to actively make every day magic a priority.
We can do this by attending to the details of our lives. To carefully plate your dinner so it’s pleasing to the eyes as it nourishes your body. To use a special mug for your morning coffee. Especially over the use of throwaway paper cups. To take an additional five minutes to sit at the table and eat your breakfast rather than eat it at your desk.
I’ve learned that doing these things creates a sense of magic. I can begin the moment feeling frustrated, irritable, or cranky and end it feeling more centered. The choice to be mindful and the extra minute or two that it takes to do so captures a bit of magic.
You may be wondering what "magic" has to do with the progression of what we've been talking about all year - especially as a follow up to Commitment and Devotion to ushering one goal into being before the end of the year. And frankly, it has everything to do with it.
Because without finding magic in your ordinary, daily life? How are you going to truly enjoy the fruits of your labors when you reach a goal?
Just like you need to commit to your goals and be devoted to your deepest desires, you need to bear witness to what already exists.
And how the magic of simple life is actually a holy helper and companion for the journey.
That means sometimes we simply need to make a magical moment for ourselves. Solely for the sake of pleasure and feeding out soul. Because feeding our soul helps us get back to work when we're tired, exhausted, overwhelmed, or burned out.
Because while the recent times have taught many women (and men) the value of slowing down to the speed of your own soul, there are a lot of folks out there that still equate being busy with worthiness. Sometimes, the only way to stop that shift into hustle mode is to find a tangible reason to slow down and seek the magic.
I was reminded of this earlier this year when I took a photography class with some friends. Part of the tuition for the class was for a nifty instant camera. And to be honest, it kind of intimidated me.
Because I've become so used to the ease of using my phone's camera for taking photos of simply anything and everything. The cameras in our phones are pretty sophisticated. And even without real knowledge of light, aperture, and other such photography jargon, most of us can take decent photos.
And, if you regularly move your photos to your computer or the cloud, you have an endless amount of "film", too. Which means that I can snap ten photos of something and know that I'll have at least one I like.
But each roll of the instant film has only 10 exposures. Just ten in comparison to endless opportunities that digital provides. And despite having some various settings and a flash (which the teacher said we should never, ever use) how a photo turns out relies on a lot of factors - like the aforementioned light and aperture and such.
After talking with a dear friend about it, she encouraged me to approach using this camera under the guise of pursuing magic. Because while we have gotten spoiled to how digital photography shows us crisp reality, using film - especially instant film - captures something that looks like a memory.
Rather than treating the film as something precious to be conserved, I am treating it like I do my best perfume: with reckless abandon.
So, about once a week I am taking the camera with me as I do errands and allowing the camera to reveal the magic in the mundane.
I'm also learning that I'm having to let go of any sense of perfection. Because no matter how carefully I frame a shot, shoot only on bright days, and check the settings, instant film is a bit finicky.
So, in seeking the magic in my ordinary days, I am also learning how to let go the need for picture-perfect (pun intended) perfection.
Though our lives may not be filled with the magic of fairy tales I hope that you can see that it exists all around you.
My invitation to you this month is to seek the magic in your daily life that already exists. To find ways to make your life more magical in the way you tend your world. And to be an active participant in creating some sort of magical moment.
As children, we were often able to see the magic in everyday living. We laughed, found pleasure in sitting in someone's lap, let the grass tickle between our toes, and sought play in any environment.
To access magic, you may need to go back to traits from childhood. For me that included an insatiable curiosity, a desire to explore, and the want to experience what the world has to offer.
So, as our days grow shorter, embrace the darkness by lighting a candle. Plan a trip for the sake of adventure and new experiences.
Sit by the fireplace with a warm beverage (or glass of wine). Get lost in the way a book transports you to wonderful places and different times. Actively look for beauty as you run errands. Witness the spark of joy in someone else's eyes.
And make a practice of regularly tending your soul in a creative pursuit such as photography or painting - even if you aren't great at it.
If you'd like to read the October 2021 love note in full, you can do so here.
And, if you'd like to receive my Monthly Love Note, sign up here.
Here's to remembering that no matter how challenging the world may seem, you are surrounded by beauty in the ordinary. Because within you is a spark of magic.
The house is almost silent save for the light strains of Mozart Piano Concerto No. 21 playing in the background. It's from my favorite playlist from Calm - Classical Piano. This simple, ordinary moment was so perfect and magical for me, I stopped to snap a photo to share with you in the newsletter. Messy desk and all. Because in this moment is exactly what I want to explore with you this month: seeing Magic in your life.
Now, I will share with you - because I value honesty - that the silence is something I've been craving all week. But, wow has been hard to come by! Despite being an extrovert, I have found the beauty in quiet. Especially when I'm writing.
Though I have gotten accustomed to the household sounds of JB working from home as well, this week was a bit beyond our norm. The painters have been here tackling things on my "Honey Do" list and they spent part of two days working in the garage which is right above my office. Said garage contents - save our cars and the snow blower - are occupying the living room and entry hall, giving me big doses of visual noise anytime I am upstairs.
Adding to the cacophony of sound are nearby homes getting new roofs, the golf course doing their (seemingly daily) mowing, and the city replacing all the curbs at every sidewalk exit.
I share this not to complain, but to share a big dose of reality...because in the chaos has been both beauty. And yes, tangible magic.
If you need to see magic with your own eyes, change the paint color somewhere in your home. It transforms a space in moments, doesn't it?
There are so many small aspects of daily, ordinary life that invite us to notice the beauty and magic.
Especially this time of year. I need but walk outside and glory in sunbeams, cool breezes, and brilliant color in the landscape to witness it.
And tending to our lives to make ordinary days more pleasant is a form of magic we can each touch, too. From home-cooked meals to fresh sheets on the bed every Friday to knowing there's a warm blanket to throw across my legs as I read in a favorite chair.
But in order to see this ordinary as magic, I have to look for it. It means I need to slow down and truly observe what's right here before me.
It's so much easier to get lost the busyness of tending life to see it, isn't there? To stressing out over the chaos in the living room and lose sight of the freshly painted garage. Or to get lost in all the noise from the workers doing their jobs as part of making people's homes and community safer and more beautiful and miss how the roses are giving me one more showing of brilliance before we have our first freeze.
Because it's human nature to focus on the worries, the distractions, and the stresses, we have to be reminded to look for what's shining through and underneath it all.
To make space for the magic of life.
Though my first exposure to the idea of magic came from fairy tales, what I believe in most deeply is that there is magic to be discovered in the everyday living.
We simply need to look for it, seek it, and choose to actively make every day magic a priority.
We can do this by attending to the details of our lives. To carefully plate your dinner so it’s pleasing to the eyes as it nourishes your body. To use a special mug for your morning coffee. Especially over the use of throwaway paper cups. To take an additional five minutes to sit at the table and eat your breakfast rather than eat it at your desk.
I’ve learned that doing these things creates a sense of magic. I can begin the moment feeling frustrated, irritable, or cranky and end it feeling more centered. The choice to be mindful and the extra minute or two that it takes to do so captures a bit of magic.
You may be wondering what "magic" has to do with the progression of what we've been talking about all year - especially as a follow up to Commitment and Devotion to ushering one goal into being before the end of the year. And frankly, it has everything to do with it.
Because without finding magic in your ordinary, daily life? How are you going to truly enjoy the fruits of your labors when you reach a goal?
Just like you need to commit to your goals and be devoted to your deepest desires, you need to bear witness to what already exists.
And how the magic of simple life is actually a holy helper and companion for the journey.
That means sometimes we simply need to make a magical moment for ourselves. Solely for the sake of pleasure and feeding out soul. Because feeding our soul helps us get back to work when we're tired, exhausted, overwhelmed, or burned out.
Because while the recent times have taught many women (and men) the value of slowing down to the speed of your own soul, there are a lot of folks out there that still equate being busy with worthiness. Sometimes, the only way to stop that shift into hustle mode is to find a tangible reason to slow down and seek the magic.
I was reminded of this earlier this year when I took a photography class with some friends. Part of the tuition for the class was for a nifty instant camera. And to be honest, it kind of intimidated me.
Because I've become so used to the ease of using my phone's camera for taking photos of simply anything and everything. The cameras in our phones are pretty sophisticated. And even without real knowledge of light, aperture, and other such photography jargon, most of us can take decent photos.
And, if you regularly move your photos to your computer or the cloud, you have an endless amount of "film", too. Which means that I can snap ten photos of something and know that I'll have at least one I like.
But each roll of the instant film has only 10 exposures. Just ten in comparison to endless opportunities that digital provides. And despite having some various settings and a flash (which the teacher said we should never, ever use) how a photo turns out relies on a lot of factors - like the aforementioned light and aperture and such.
After talking with a dear friend about it, she encouraged me to approach using this camera under the guise of pursuing magic. Because while we have gotten spoiled to how digital photography shows us crisp reality, using film - especially instant film - captures something that looks like a memory.
Rather than treating the film as something precious to be conserved, I am treating it like I do my best perfume: with reckless abandon.
So, about once a week I am taking the camera with me as I do errands and allowing the camera to reveal the magic in the mundane.
I'm also learning that I'm having to let go of any sense of perfection. Because no matter how carefully I frame a shot, shoot only on bright days, and check the settings, instant film is a bit finicky.
So, in seeking the magic in my ordinary days, I am also learning how to let go the need for picture-perfect (pun intended) perfection.
Though our lives may not be filled with the magic of fairy tales I hope that you can see that it exists all around you.
My invitation to you this month is to seek the magic in your daily life that already exists. To find ways to make your life more magical in the way you tend your world. And to be an active participant in creating some sort of magical moment.
As children, we were often able to see the magic in everyday living. We laughed, found pleasure in sitting in someone's lap, let the grass tickle between our toes, and sought play in any environment.
To access magic, you may need to go back to traits from childhood. For me that included an insatiable curiosity, a desire to explore, and the want to experience what the world has to offer.
So, as our days grow shorter, embrace the darkness by lighting a candle. Plan a trip for the sake of adventure and new experiences.
Sit by the fireplace with a warm beverage (or glass of wine). Get lost in the way a book transports you to wonderful places and different times. Actively look for beauty as you run errands. Witness the spark of joy in someone else's eyes.
And make a practice of regularly tending your soul in a creative pursuit such as photography or painting - even if you aren't great at it.
If you'd like to read the October 2021 love note in full, you can do so here.
And, if you'd like to receive my Monthly Love Note, sign up here.
Here's to remembering that no matter how challenging the world may seem, you are surrounded by beauty in the ordinary. Because within you is a spark of magic.
