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Peter Derk

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Peter Derk

Goodreads Author


Born
in The United States
Website

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Member Since
February 2009


Peter Derk doesn't understand why they've never sold a Twix called "Twick" that's just one long bar made of the two bars mashed together. ...more

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Peter Derk Can I tell you a story about this?

The first time I was in a gay bar was because of an incident where a friend's car got towed. We walked a ways to mee…more
Can I tell you a story about this?

The first time I was in a gay bar was because of an incident where a friend's car got towed. We walked a ways to meet another friend, a gay guy and his partner, who were going to help us out. They were in a gay bar, and they insisted we have a drink with them first before we got down to business. By which I mean "get a ride home." By which I mean get in a vehicle and drive it...let's just keep going with the story.

I walked in, we had a drink, and I left. And you know what? Nobody hit on me. Nobody talked to me. It was almost like -gasp- pretty much a normal bar.

Now, I fully expected that guys would love me. Because ladies were kind of ho-hum about me, so I figured that meant dudes would be all about it. Because a gay guy is the opposite of a girl, right?

Nope. Turns out, nope, not at all. In fact, a gay gentleman's proclivities really don't have much to do with a woman's. It's kind of like it's own whole thing. Actually, I'll revise that. It's exactly like it's own whole thing.

This was a lesson learned when I was maybe 21. So a little old, but what can I say, I grew up podunk.

So while turning to gay men might seem like an alternative, flipping the switch from OFF to ON, it doesn't really work that way.

Here's my advice to you and really the advice I would give to any young person who is having this sort of problem: Pursue an interest that's NOT having a boyfriend or girlfriend.

Get interested in something. Get a hobby. Seriously. This is the best thing you can do for yourself, and it's going to make your future relationships much richer.

For one thing, you'll become a better, deeper, more interesting person.

For another, if your hobby is pursuing romance, then once you have romance, what then? What do you have left at that point?

Get a hobby. I would possibly suggest some sort of queer studies classes in your particular case. Or model rocketry. (less)
Peter Derk Oh, please. A 5-star review? I wasn't born yesterday.

In all seriousness, or as much seriousness as I can muster for Goodreads, I really do appreciate …more
Oh, please. A 5-star review? I wasn't born yesterday.

In all seriousness, or as much seriousness as I can muster for Goodreads, I really do appreciate the nice reviews and things people say about my books. And I get steamed about the bad ones. Because I'm a human man and it doesn't feel good when people say bad things.

I don't hit Like anymore these days because, well, I really do appreciate the nice reviews, but I also know that book reviewers don't necessarily want to have a dialog with me, and...it feels a little creepy.

I do my fair share of reviewing, and I have been contacted by authors a couple times. Both for books I gave middling reviews. And...I didn't love it. It was weird.

I also think it can be a little creepy. I've worked/volunteered a few jobs working with youth. If you're a single, adult man working with youth, you learn to stay as far away from creepsville as is humanly possible. Your creepification monitor is very sensitive. Trust me, this might sound weird to you, but any others who've walked a mile in those shoes know what I'm talking about. So, I am super averse to doing anything remotely creepy, which probably hurts me sometimes because it's good to develop relationships with readers, but I'm going better safe than sorry on this one.

There was another event that made me think this way.

When I put out the first book I put out, a book of poems, someone gave it a 1-star review. I knew this person as a friend of friend of friend kind of thing, and I did think it was extremely uncool to give it a 1-star. I went to this person's profile and was looking at other ratings, and was like, "Wait, if you were this charitable all along, what the hell?"

I was seriously considering clicking "Like" on this review. So the person would know I'd seen it. And maybe think, "Oh, yeah. Real person. Not cool."

But then I took a breath and was like, "Whoa." Not like a Matrix whoa, like a cowboy stopping a spooked horse kind of whoa.

I'm not a professional author, but I can still act like one. And a pro can take it when someone dislikes their book. I learned an important lesson from Rocky Balboa: "It's not how hard you can hit. It's how hard you can GET hit and keep moving forward." Rocky was right. Punch drunk, but right. Being a pro is about getting hit and moving forward, not about hitting back.

I didn't hit that Like button. And I decided not to hit the positive ones either. I'm just not like some big time guy, like a Stephen King. If Stephen King liked my 5-star review, I'd be pretty happy. But Peter Derk? Who gives a shit?

I think reviews are for readers. They help readers make good choices on how to spend their time and money. Sure, I look at 'em. And I'm heartwarmed when I see a glowing one. But I have to assume that even the nice reviews were not written to make me feel good, they were written to tell people about a good book. Unless they're by friends and family. Then I figure they're at least kinda meant to make me feel good, and I'm 100% fine with that.

I'm very grateful to anyone who reads my books, whether they end up liking them or not. There are a lot of choices for people out there, lots of ways you all can spend your time, and I'm honored when you choose to spend your time with my books. If you want to be chummy with me, tag me in your review on Twitter or Instagram, or email me. I'm helpfulsnowman on Twitter, Instagram, and gmail. Pretty much everywhere. Also, feel free to chat me up on reviews I do of other books, books I didn't write.

As for reviews of my books, I'll be there, but not in a creepy way. Maybe just looking down like Mufasa from the clouds. Except not dead. And not a lion. And none of you are my kids. I do suspect that some of you have tried to strike up a relationship with a fun meerkat/warthog duo, but that's because you're weird. (less)
Average rating: 3.97 · 204 ratings · 87 reviews · 32 distinct worksSimilar authors
Pete's Exhaustive Review of...

4.22 avg rating — 45 ratings — published 2016 — 2 editions
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Ghost Dick: Private Eye

3.70 avg rating — 23 ratings — published 2018 — 2 editions
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Harold's Coming

3.10 avg rating — 20 ratings — published 2021 — 2 editions
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The Heist-est Heist Ever He...

really liked it 4.00 avg rating — 14 ratings — published 2021 — 3 editions
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Barehanded: poems

really liked it 4.00 avg rating — 13 ratings — published 2011 — 3 editions
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Dear Runaway: a novel in le...

4.70 avg rating — 10 ratings — published 2019 — 3 editions
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Ninja Sons

4.09 avg rating — 11 ratings — published 2015 — 3 editions
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Skeleton Army: a novel of a...

really liked it 4.00 avg rating — 7 ratings — published 2015 — 4 editions
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My Mother's Silver Bowl

4.17 avg rating — 6 ratings — published 2021 — 2 editions
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Tough Shoot: a short essay

3.83 avg rating — 6 ratings — published 2014 — 4 editions
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A Post so Jason Can Have a Link

Apparently Goodreads will not allow non-Goodreads links in comments. I guess this is because they would probably be almost entirely links for things that nobody wants.

Which isn't to say that people are rushing to read what I offer, but ONE PERSON has indeed requested this link.

Jason, here you go:
https://helpfulsnowman.substack.com/p...

I promise I'm very pleasant in real life and not normally this Read more of this blog post »
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Published on January 08, 2025 15:22
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The Complete Stories
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Peter’s Recent Updates

Peter Derk rated a book really liked it
Vinland Saga Omnibus, Vol. 14 by Makoto Yukimura
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Dig this: A bunch of people land in a new spot, work pretty hard to make it farm-able, but then the locals, who were there before, want to kick them the fuck out for legitimate reasons, namely, PLAGUE.

And the newbies have a choice: They COULD stay an
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A Silent Voice Complete Collector's Edition 2 by Yoshitoki Oima
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I think I might be the only person who read this and had no idea it was already a movie which, surprisingly to many, seems to have skipped a lot of stuff that's in the book.

Guys, this is a 7-volume series. OF COURSE there's a bunch of stuff missing f
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A Silent Voice Complete Collector's Edition 1 by Yoshitoki Oima
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It's like a romcom but not overly rom, not overly com. So maybe more like a FrienDram?

I do like that this, unlike most romantic type stories, presents us with a genuinely unlikable protagonist, who genuinely was a little dickhead. ENOUGH with the pro
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Marc *Dark Reader with a Thousand Young! Iä!*
Marc *Dark Reader with a Thousand Young! Iä!* is on page 2 of 707 of The Butcher's Masquerade: I'm on the second page and it's so fucking good.

Did you hear me, I said IT'S SO FUCKING GOOD. I AM SO FUCKING STOKED RIGHT NOW.
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No Romance In Hell by Hyena Hell
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I have to say, not a great plan on this demon's part. If I wasn't having luck with dating, let's just say, let's take that WILD trip into fiction, that ASININE assumption, that wholly ridiculous starting point—if for some reason I wasn't slaying ass ...more
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John Kenn Mortensen's Nightmare Factory by John Kenn Mortensen
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It's difficult to argue that pedo-coded creeps aren't creepy. I like to argue about a lot of things, and that's one I'm not even TOUCHING. ...more
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Bowling with Corpses & Other Strange Tales from Lands Unknown by Mike Mignola
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Mike Mignola "retires" and then just puts out fun, spooky fairy tale books that are better than anything I could write and draw in a thousand lifetimes.

What an asshole.
...more
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Exquisite Corpses, Volume 1 by James Tynion IV
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I liked this a lot, but I fucked up in reading it before it's finished. I can never keep track of all these different series very long. My brain has thoroughly been rotted by comics. It's true what my English teacher said. Damn it. If only I'd been r ...more
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Gantz G Omnibus by Hiroya Oku
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Gantz beat Ghostbusters to the idea of taking a franchise and reimagining it as all-female.

You know what Gantz did that was smarter, I think?

Gantz had the G team and the mainline team both exist in the same world. Like, why did Ghostbusters 2016 hav
...more
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Fantastic Four By Chip Zdarsky by Chip Zdarsky
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Johnny Storm buys an expensive leather jacket he's DEFINITLEY just going to burn off his own body while he argues with Sue Storm about why everyone treats him like an irresponsible dingus. This is like me complaining to my wife about why when I used ...more
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Quotes by Peter Derk  (?)
Quotes are added by the Goodreads community and are not verified by Goodreads. (Learn more)

“​You might have to hurt yourself if you want to really be alone for a little while.”
Peter Derk, Dear Runaway: a novel in letters

“All I did one summer was lay down on a shitty 70's couch and listen to bands I won't even talk about because they're too embarrassing. A whole summer like that. ​Okay, fine. It was Staind.”
Peter Derk, Dear Runaway: a novel in letters

“​I try really hard not to live how people think I live.”
Peter Derk, Dear Runaway: a novel in letters

Topics Mentioning This Author

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Turn of a Page: This topic has been closed to new comments. March Weekly Readathon 11th-17th (Closed) 55 81 Mar 18, 2022 07:24AM  
Turn of a Page: This topic has been closed to new comments. March Monthly Readathon 91 116 Apr 01, 2022 10:25AM  
Turn of a Page: Shandra's Thread 60 28 Dec 29, 2022 08:16AM  
“Game shows are designed to make us feel better about the random, useless facts that are all we have left of our education.”
Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

“Remember; no matter how desperate the situation seems, time spent
thinking clearly is never time wasted.”
Max Brooks, Zombie Survival Guide, The: Complete Protection From The Living Dead

“Why do people have to be this lonely? What's the point of it all? Millions of people in this world, all of them yearning, looking to others to satisfy them, yet isolating themselves. Why? Was the earth put here just to nourish human loneliness?”
Haruki Murakami, Sputnik Sweetheart

“Fuck concepts. Don't be afraid to be confused. Try to remain permanently confused. Anything is possible. Stay open, forever, so open it hurts, and then open up some more, until the day you die, world without end, amen.”
George Saunders

“All these weirdos, and me getting a little better every day right in the midst of them. I had never known, never even imagined for a heartbeat, that there might be a place for people like us.”
Denis Johnson, Jesus' Son

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Prepping for ReadCon coming to HPLD in November 2013 by reading titles associated with the visiting authors.
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Are you going to CALCON 2016? Why not join up with our little book club? It'll get you ready for the best of what you'll see that weekend, not to ment ...more
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If you would love to join a book club, but you don’t want to leave your house, now you can!
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We read comics all the time! https://www.facebook.com/COMIC-BOOK-Crazies-290288951356668/s
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Graham Parke Hey, good to have you aboard ;)


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