Bawdy Quotes

“I am metaphysical being, mystical and emotional, skeptical and cynical, happy and boisterous, loud and bawdy, quiet and melancholy, tender and cruel, full of mirth and despair. Inherent inconsistences mark me as part of nature, which is neither cruel nor fair, or reliable or predictable.”
― Kilroy J. Oldster, Dead Toad Scrolls

“These days, you could stage a three-point orgy in the garden and nobody would bat an eye...”
― Angela Carter

“Ha!’ cackled the fiend, ‘I expect you’d like revenge on that husband of yours. Murder shouldn’t go unpunished, and no creature enjoys delivering chastisement as much as I. What about giving him a taste of his own medicine? If you’d be so kind as to lend me your body, I’ll set him dancing to my tune.’

The wife’s spectre grimaced and nodded, at which the wicked Likho stripped off the nightgown, then the dead woman’s pliant skin, peeling back the flaccid folds. These it left in a slack heap.

It gobbled her flesh and sucked the bones clean. These it hid behind the stove, before inserting itself inside the empty, wrinkled carcass, taking the former position of the corpse. Its fat tongue swiped the last juices from around its lips.

When the husband returned home, all was as it had been; there was not a speck of blood to be seen, although the strangest smell of rotten eggs lingered”
― Emmanuelle de Maupassant, Cautionary Tales: a collection of darkly delicious folktales

“I was appraising . . . not eye fooking.”
― Paul Allor, Tet

“Ooh! Oo-wooh!' groaned Henry, looking up to see that even Albert Einstein was willing him on. Amber grasped at lumps of his flesh and felt as if she were steering a rickety bus on a bumpy goat track.”
― Kevin Ansbro, The Fish That Climbed a Tree

“You may go in and search, sir. Here I find
The empty walls worse than I left 'em, smoked;
A few cracked pots and glasses, and a furnace;
The ceiling filled with poesies of the candle,
And madam with a dildo writ o' the walls.”
― Ben Jonson, The Alchemist