Chuck Norris Jokes Quotes

“Superman once challenged Chuck Norris to a fight, the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Chuck Norris Jokes And Facts: The Best And Funniest Kick-ass Facts About Roughest, Toughest, Deadliest, Sexiest & The Most Fearless ... The Legend

“Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse kick you in the face.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

“Chuck Norris can divide by zero.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

“When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

“Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

“Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

“Chuck Norris CAN understand women.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Chuck Norris Jokes And Facts: The Best And Funniest Kick-ass Facts About Roughest, Toughest, Deadliest, Sexiest & The Most Fearless ... The Legend

“For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed