Funny Joke Quotes (22 quotes)

“(Hunter) "conner was at his desk, tapping away at another computer. It was amazing how much he and Quinn looked alike. Quinn nudged me as if he knew what I was thinking.
"I'm cuter,"he informed me loftily.”
― Alyxandra Harvey, Out for Blood

tags: funny-joke, humor, hunter-and-quinn

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“Yo Mama's so fat her butt cheeks have different area codes.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Yo Mama Dirty Jokes: Yo Mama Funny, Dirty, Filthy Joke Book For Adults - Uncensored edition

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“Superman once challenged Chuck Norris to a fight, the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Chuck Norris Jokes And Facts: The Best And Funniest Kick-ass Facts About Roughest, Toughest, Deadliest, Sexiest & The Most Fearless ... The Legend

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“Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse kick you in the face.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

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“Chuck Norris can divide by zero.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

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“When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

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“Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

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“Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

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“Yo Mama’s so ugly, her Mama had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes

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“Yo Mama’s so poor, when I lit her house on fire, the cockroaches came out singing, “Clap your hands, stomp your feet, praise the Lord, we got some heat!”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes

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“Yo Mama sucks so much d***, her lips went double platinum.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Yo Mama Dirty Jokes: Yo Mama Funny, Dirty, Filthy Joke Book For Adults - Uncensored edition

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“Yo Mama's like a library, open to the public.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Yo Mama Dirty Jokes: Yo Mama Funny, Dirty, Filthy Joke Book For Adults - Uncensored edition

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“Yo Mama's so fat, her ass has its own congressman!”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Yo Mama Dirty Jokes: Yo Mama Funny, Dirty, Filthy Joke Book For Adults - Uncensored edition

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“Chuck Norris CAN understand women.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Chuck Norris Jokes And Facts: The Best And Funniest Kick-ass Facts About Roughest, Toughest, Deadliest, Sexiest & The Most Fearless ... The Legend

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“For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

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“Yo Mama’s so ugly, her dentist treats her by mail order.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes

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“Yo Mama’s so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes

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“Yo Mama’s so old, her memory is in black and white.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes

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“Yo Mama’s so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said, “Sorry, no professionals.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest YO MAMA Jokes

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“If Yo Mama and Yo Daddy got a divorce, they'd still be brother and sister.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Yo Mama Dirty Jokes: Yo Mama Funny, Dirty, Filthy Joke Book For Adults - Uncensored edition

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“Yo Mama's like mustard, she spreads easy.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed, 155 World's Funniest Yo Mama Dirty Jokes: Yo Mama Funny, Dirty, Filthy Joke Book For Adults - Uncensored edition

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“What’s the difference between Yo Mama and a 747?
-About 20 pounds.
-Yo mama carries more passengers.
-Not everyone's been on a 747.”
― Oliver Oliver Reed

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