P G Wodehouse Quotes

“I mean, if you're asking a fellow to come out of a room so that you can dismember him with a carving knife, it's absurd to tack a 'sir' on to every sentence. The two things don't go together.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Thank You, Jeeves

“...with each new book of mine I have always the feeling that this time I have picked a lemon in the garden of literature.”
― P.G. Wodehouse

“The fact that pigs were abroad in the night seemed to bring home to me the perilous nature of my enterprise.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Right Ho, Jeeves

“A chap's bedroom – you can't get way from it – is his castle, and he has every right to look askance if gargoyles come glaring in at him.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Right Ho, Jeeves

“More and more, it was beginning to be borne in upon me what a particularly difficult chap Gussie was to help. He seemed to so marked an extent to lack snap and finish. With infinite toil, you manoeuvred him into a position where all he had to do was charge ahead, and he didn't charge ahead, but went off sideways, missing the objective completely.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Right Ho, Jeeves

“There are certain moments in life when words are not needed. I looked at Biffy, Biffy looked at me. A perfect understanding linked our two souls.
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― P.G. Wodehouse, Carry On, Jeeves

“I'm a quiet, peaceful sort of bloke who has lived all his life in London, and I can't stand the pace these swift sportsmen from the rural districts set. What I mean to say is, I'm all for rational enjoyment and so forth, but I think a chappie makes himself conspicuous when he throws soft-boiled eggs at the electric fan.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, Carry On, Jeeves

“Reading the book now means that one can, if one wants, play Fantasy Literature--match writers off against each other and see who won over the long haul. Faulkner or Henry Green? I reckon the surprise champ was P.G. Wodehouse, as elegant and resourceful a prose stylist as anyone held up for our inspection here...he has turned out to be as enduring as anyone apart from Orwell. Jokes, you see. People do like jokes.

(Hornby's thoughts after reading "Enemies of Promise" by Cyril Connolly)”
― Nick Hornby, The Polysyllabic Spree

“Humour, if one looks into it, is principally a matter of retrospect.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, The Prince And Betty

“I wonder if you have noticed a rather rummy thing about it -- viz. that it is everywhere. You can't get away from it. Love, I mean. Wherever you go, there it is, buzzing along in every class of life. Quite remarkable.”
― P. G. Wodehouse

“Well, this should certainly teach us, should it not, never to repine, never to despair, never to allow the upper lip to unstiffen, but always to remember that, no matter how dark the skies may be, the sun is shining somewhere and will eventually come smiling through.”
― P. G. Wodehouse

“He lost his appetite for reading. He was afraid of being overwhelmed again. In mystery novels people died like dolls being discarded; in science fiction enormities of space and time conspired to crush the humans ; and even in P.G. Wodehouse he felt a hollowness, a turning away from reality that was implicitly bitter, and became explicit in the comic figures of futile parsons.”
― John Updike , Pigeon Feathers and Other Stories

“The gods are business-like. They sell; they do not give. And for what they sell they demand a heavy price. We may buy life of them in many ways; with our honour, our health, our independence, our happiness; with our brains or with our hands. But somehow or other, in whatever currency we may choose to pay it, the price must be paid.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, The Prince And Betty

“It's an extraordinary thing about names. You've probably noticed it yourself. You think you've got them, I mean to say, and they simply slither away. I've often wished I had a quid for every time some bird with a perfectly familiar map has come up to me and Hallo-Woostered, and had me gasping for air because I couldn't put a label to him. This always makes one feel at a loss.”
― P. G. Wodehouse

“London late at night -- or even in the daytime, for that matter -- is no place for a man in scarlet tights.”
― P G Wodehouse, Right Ho, Jeeves Illustrated

“Jeeves tells me you want to talk to me about something,' I said.

'Eh?' said Bingo, with a start. 'Oh yes, yes. Yes.'

I waited for him to unleash the topic of the day, but he didn't seem to want to get along. Conversation languished. He stared straight ahead of him in a glassy sort of manner.

'I say, Bertie,' he said, after a pause of about an hour and a quarter.

'Hallo!'

'Do you like the name Mabel?'

'No.”
― P.G. Wodehouse, The Inimitable Jeeves

“There is no way of reviewing this book that makes sense. To the Wodehouse following, it only requires announcement. To the others, who have tried Wodehouse and found themselves wanting, one can only say that they don't know what they are missing. One cannot go further. To say that his latest book is his funniest is a bromide; his latest book is always his funniest.”
― George Stevens