Astrid

“An elementary school student in South Carolina stumped him with a gotcha question even more challenging than Hiller’s about the president of Chechnya: What was his favorite book as a child? “I can’t remember any specific books,” he said. Later, responding to a similar query in a written questionnaire, he summoned an answer: The Very Hungry Caterpillar. Though that book might have been his favorite, it was published a year after he graduated from Yale.”
― Andy Borowitz, Profiles in Ignorance: How America's Politicians Got Dumb and Dumber

“I want the president of the United States to be intellectually curious for a simple reason: I think the person running the country should be smarter than I am. We’ve just lived through the alternative, and it was only good for the liquor industry.”
― Andy Borowitz, Profiles in Ignorance: How America's Politicians Got Dumb and Dumber

“If by a "Liberal" they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people-their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights and their civil liberties-someone who believes we can break through the stalemate and suspicions that grip us in our policies abroad, if that is what they mean by a "Liberal", then I'm proud to say I'm a "Liberal.”
― John F. Kennedy, Profiles in Courage

“Being dumb’s just about the worst thing there is when it comes to holding high office. —HARRY S. TRUMAN The worst thing a man can do is go bald. —DONALD J. TRUMP”
― Andy Borowitz, Profiles in Ignorance: How America's Politicians Got Dumb and Dumber