Nix Buttons

“Of all the things I expected out of you, swords were not it."
"Why? I like shiny things that make other things go squish."
[...]
“Tell me that’s a lightsaber.”
Zia came around to join them, and she was quick to correct. “No, not quite. It’s a bejeweled magical sword, activated by runes that—”
“It’s totally a lightsaber,” Wicky cut in, handing it over with glee.
[...]
Nico was already bounding ahead, lightsaber in full swing. “My name is Nicholas di Rocci. You threatened my mage. Prepare to die!”
And then he promptly started making lightsaber noises as he cut into two ROUSes. “Vrãu, vrãu—”
― A.J. Sherwood, A Mage's Guide to Human Familiars

“Seriously, man. How did you fuck up this bad?"
Atticus's eyes bulged behind his glasses, his face contorting. "My fucking gun jammed. I had to improvise."
Adam gaped at him. "And your first thought was a hatchet?"
Atticus snorted, his voice full of derision when he said "It's a meat cleaver, you miscreant.”
― Onley James, Unhinged

“His sister sighed. “I’m starting to become concerned about your taste, little brother. She’s…odd.”
“She’s odd because she’s brilliant.” He motioned to the exit where the female had disappeared. “At this moment, she’s discussing things you and I could never even comprehend.”
...
“I absolutely could create a lightsaber.”
― Shelly Laurenston, When He Was Bad

“I suppose you only date Irishmen?"
"Before you... I had a typewriter and - one night stands."
"Don't feel bad, most of my relationships have ended in murder.”
― Missouri Dalton