Carl

“At long last, I felt a sense of accomplishment and a sense of closure. In the secret places of my very small heart, I had long entertained dreams of coming back in my next life as a moron.”
― Joe Queenan, Queenan Country: A Reluctant Anglophile's Pilgrimage to the Mother Country

“He used books the same way he used alcohol: to pretend that he was not here, and if he was here, that he was happy for a change.”
― Joe Queenan, One for the Books

“Unless paid, I never read books by or about businessmen or politicians, nor should anyone else.”
― Joe Queenan, One for the Books

“I like to stack them up on the shelf and move them about and rearrange them according to new parameters-height, color, thickness, provenance, publisher, author's nationality, subject matter, likelihood that I will ever read them. Then I put them back the way they were.”
― Joe Queenan, One for the Books