Status Updates From Beware of the Purple Peanut...

The last ending of the book. I wonder if you call Dr. Abbott to have him restore your body's original polarity. As we see from the alternative ending, this magnetism could be the death of you.

You're assuming a lot, figuring you'll be able to switch bodies back with Dr. Abbott anytime you please.

That's a pretty good ending. The horror is more realistic than most of this book.

That's not fair! The gimmick of how many letters are in your first name doesn't change your fate, it just puts it off by an extra page. I cry foul.

That was nonsensical. Sure, maybe as a doll-sized human your voice is too weak to be heard, but why didn't you flail your arms to show Dora you're alive?

That definitely pushed the silly line over the edge. And as I suspected, there was no real reason to make us choose between the cake crumb and the icing.

Why was a choice necessary? Couldn't I have tried the cake crumb and icing?

Hmm...How convenient that you happened to find the old refrigerator at the dump so quickly.

For a book that started well, this has mostly devolved into a formless free-for-all.

I'm shrunk down so small that I can ride a popsicle stick through the sewers. I hope I don't shrink more, or no one will be able to see and help me.

Back to the book's central branching decision. Will eating the weird peanut butter have better results than the tasteless chocolate cake from Effy's Bakery?

For me, this book is hovering close to one-star territory. At this portion of the text there's almost no regard for internal consistency.

I'm having doubts about this book. In the branch I'm on, at least, continuity regarding when and where you return to normal size is being handled in a fast and loose manner.

What happens if I yield myself to capture and study by Dr. Harlan?

There have been shaky continuity aspects recently. Why did you shrink back down so quickly in the first route, and take such a long time to do so in this one?

Are the alien researchers well-armed enough to take me in against my will?

Ha! There actually is a Maddy's Bakery? I wonder if that's a coincidence, or you'd heard the name and that's why you were confused.

That was an uncommonly long story thread, but not as well managed as the extended narratives of Trapped in Bat Wing Hall. This storyline strains credibility to the limit and beyond.

This ending is definitely longer than when we pick Barney up and dangle him off the ground to confront him. Can we successfully hide away from the pitchfork mob in the sideshow circus tent?

Throwing an object in Barney's path when I'm this size seems dubious...but I guess that's what I'll try next. My first ending of the book was not perfect, to say the least.

Not a bad ending, but I wonder how you explain the hole you gouged in the side of the house. Do you claim you ate chocolate cake in the off-limits basement that caused you to grow into a giant?

Will there be trouble with the law for batting that home run ball so far that we broke a window in a house that should have been unreachable?

Some of the baseball setup is cliche and convenient, but I like the feel of the narrative so far. It comes at us fast and direct.

Can you match your sudden growth with equal self-confidence?

This book does a good job setting the atmosphere. The description of the mostly nondescript basement makes it feel interesting, and as though you are there. I'm going to try the cake first, because eating glop in a jar is a revolting thought.

Cover art by the always amusing Mark Nagata. I've never given this book the cover-to-cover read and review it deserves, so now is the time. I always liked Beware of the Purple Peanut Butter; I hope it lives up to my memories.