baneet > Recent Status Updates

more names: campbell (neve), wes carpenter (john), and jennifer (“‘s body”)

anyway. jamie was like “this can’t be the end, right?” no girl it’s not, there’s two hours left of this audiobook. also i was right about the killer being a woman.

i need the male narrator to PLEASE speak louder i have to keep replaying his segments bc i can’t understand him

mc is named jamie (lee curtis) prescott (sidney, “scream”). her best friend is laurie (“halloween”), and people at their speed-dating event are john (carpenter), wes (craven), and billy and stu (also “scream”).

they keep saying the killer is a man in love with jamie, and jamie acknowledges that it’s statistically more likely to be a male killer than female, but the more it’s mentioned, the more i think this killer is a woman

perhaps this book is set in a world where the 2025 “heart eyes” movie does not exist, or it has not yet been produced/released, or jamie just hasn’t seen it. but obviously jamie would 1000% have seen “heart eyes” bc it’s a slasher romcom, which are her fave genres, so the most likely conclusion here is that the movie simply does not exist in this book

no bc my first thought when jamie saw the killer’s mask was “omg just like heart eyes from the spectacular olivia holt movie from 2025, ‘heart eyes’” and then jamie goes and names the killer in this novel “heart eyes” which Makes Sense given her reasoning that fictional slashers get easy appearance-related names. but also girl help there’s already a heart eyes killer

“did you really come to a gay bar in vegas just to make fun of me?” oh scott baby this is ilya rozanov we’re talking about, of COURSE he did

a second “don’t tell me you’re secretly dating rozanov” has hit the game changer

imagine secretly dating ilya rozanov…

kip: all the [smoothie] names here are kinda dumb.
scott, pointing at kip’s name tag: i like your name.

OKAY SCOTT HUNTER

so hunny and mori know that tamaki, hikaru, and kasanoda each have a crush on haruhi (and are at different levels of self-awareness)… but wtf exactly did hunny mean when he followed that up with “and then there’s kaoru and kyoya. one of them is also unaware of his feelings.” um????????

not me sobbing when my gal miss nadia(?) gave up her saris 😭

i hate this stupid mf tree

tamaki’s grandmother appeared and hunny immediately said “i hate her” BROOOOOOOO

THEYRE SO STUPID AND IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER

whoops i finished this last year and forgot to log it lol

interpreting the animal transformations to be an analogy for terminal diagnoses… ouch….

i’m following the plot better than i was before, but there are way too many characters and POV switches that i can’t keep track of who is who. the narration is not distinct enough, and the only reason i can sorta differentiate is bc of the plethora of audiobook VAs. lil demon and lil psycho are the same guy to me 😭

yeah i know im a third of the way into the book. i think i need to restart it tho bc i lost the plot, and i have no idea where i lost it

HUH???????????

haven’t started this yet but needed to make the note to myself that i need to switch to physical/ebook for the rest of this series or find a different audiobook narrator bc i can only tolerate martin freeman for so long and i’m well past my limit now

very autistic of arthur to notice that his collection of interesting rocks was wrong bc it was boring

this book unsettles me more than stephen king

dnf for now, i don’t like the audiobook narration

hot take but if i was tj, i would stop helping john cover up whatever murder plot he has going on. very extremely shitty of john to continuously treat tj’s sobriety like it’s nothing

gay gay homosexual gay (they kissed)

not the scarecrow calling elphaba a lesbian barely five minutes into the book 😭 he’s right tho

no bc why was the titular story (out of the four stories in this book) the least interesting. bro i nearly dnf’ed during chapter 9 (out of 16), but i just skipped the rest of it to listen to the final story.
my fave was “the chaser” (which was narrated by one of the VAs from “the bright sessions” podcast!!!)

…and everyone clapped

i feel like i need to take a few days off and then reread this book…