Status Update

Jonathan Orme is 81% done

Mark:

This book is perfect for my destroyed attention span because there is ZERO filler. Bam, important event, bam, important event, immediately, euthus euthus euthus! Could probably have just been bullet points.

— 8 hours, 29 min ago

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Jonathan’s Previous Updates

Jonathan Orme is 80% done

Matthew:

Imagine being banished to the Shadow Realm for wearing khakis to a black tie wedding.

— Apr 30, 2026 07:05PM

Jonathan Orme is 77% done

Matthew:

Imagine being banished to the Shadow Realm for wearing khakis to a black tie wedding.

— Apr 30, 2026 07:04PM

Jonathan Orme is 77% done

Malachi:

Esau just cannot catch a break! My goodness!

— Apr 15, 2026 09:14AM

Jonathan Orme is 76% done

Zechariah:

What? I'm not a prophet. I'm a, uh, uh, a farmer! Yeah, a farmer. I farm. I don't even put honey on my locusts!

— Apr 15, 2026 03:42AM

Jonathan Orme is 76% done

Haggai:

Call him Zerubbabling because he be a signet ring

— Apr 07, 2026 06:55PM

Jonathan Orme is 75% done

Zephaniah:

Anyone who's watched the Owl House knows that a hoot comes before destruction.

— Apr 07, 2026 04:37AM

Jonathan Orme is 75% done

Habakkuk:

"Stop making for yourself images of wood and gold. God is not there, they can do nothing for you!"

*one chapter later*

Choirmaster Ryan Seacrest: "Tonight, on Hebrew Idol..."

— Apr 06, 2026 09:19AM

Jonathan Orme is 75% done

Nahum:

I guess Jonah eventually gets his wish.

— Apr 06, 2026 08:59AM

Jonathan Orme is 75% done

Micah:

Finally found the George Washington retirement verse from Hamilton

— Mar 27, 2026 05:16PM

Jonathan Orme is 74% done

Jonah:

The cows! Don't forget about the cows!

— Mar 13, 2026 03:46AM