Sammantha Anderson's Blog

This week is probably going to be a short post. I have not been able to do a lot of writing this week. I have spent most of my time packing. I move in a week and I can’t tell you how excited I am to be in my new place. The writing I have done has been mostly poetry. The plan is to have more poems, that way Matt and I can pick and choose what we want in our book. This book is not just mine, it’s Matt’s too. I have also seen in my head what the cover should look like. Now I just need to find a name for it. For me, it’s important that he is part of every step.

I have also been thinking about how I am going to get to the end I have written for book six. There are a few pieces that Savannah has given me that I still have to write. I can see three different scenes that I have to write and I have no clue how I am going to get to each of those scenes. This is one of those moments where I have planned, to a point and Savannah takes over. She throws me scenes that I then have to figure out where they go. In a lot of ways I think as a writer, you can only plan so far. Then out of nowhere your characters take the reins and it all goes to hell. It feels like I am trying to rangle squirrels. It's just me running around going, what are you doing and yelling don’t do that? Savannah and Meri many times have ideas of their own. Matthew is another one that does that. Many times he forces his way to the front and then sits breathing down my neck until I give into him. It's one of the reasons the end of the book is written already. Matthew had something to say and I was going to listen whether I liked it or not.

So what do you do when your writing plan goes to hell? For me, I try to fight it for a short period of time telling them that it’s not supposed to be this way. Eventually, I give in to their demands and I do as they say. There are days I tell Savannah that she needs to stop causing chaos. Her response to that is it’s her story and I need to shut the hell up and do my job. Sadly, I give her what she wants and I abandon my plans and start creating a new plan. The hard part is I never know if she will do it again. It is one of the reasons I do not write out too many chapter cards in advance because I never know if Savannah is going to add something.

The lesson in all of this is to be flexible when it comes to writing. You may see things one way but as you go through the process you may realize the story is taking on a different direction. You may find that your initial thoughts were wrong. Do not try to force a story that is not right, you will only hurt yourself and your story in the end. Until next time!

The last two weeks have been a bit of a trial. I recently lost a friend to suicide and the loss of this friend is something I am still trying to understand. He was a man that always made you laugh, had a smile and a hug for you. He was a good person and I am a better person for knowing him.

Despite the heart ache I feel I have been writing as much as possible, getting closer to the end of book six. I have the goal of finishing this book within the next two weeks. I am unsure if I will meet my own deadline but I am feeling good about this section of the book and the last two chapters of the book. I have also been working on my poetry, getting more written than I have in several weeks. The one problem I am facing is when I will have time to write during the weekend. I am getting ready to move to my new place and I am trying to finish packing. On top of that, I am running out of room for boxes. My kids, Mom, and I are surrounded by boxes. Seriously, I could make a fort out of boxes. As fun as that sounds, I am a little over the boxes.

To add to the stress I have been dealing with not just my day job but also helping my daughter with her online school. When I picked online instead of two days of in person learning I thought this will be a great fit for her. There is a part of me that is saying she just doesn’t have the hang of it yet. There is another part of me that says what have I done? I have spent a few of my writing nights doing school work with my kid. It is a legitimate reason not to get writing done but it frustrates me.

My life has been rapidly changing. What I foresaw as my future seems to be completely wrong. In fact, the way I pictured my life after divorce is not the way it is playing out. I am starting to see a different life entirely with new players in it. I am trying to wrap my head around the change of events and not to run away scared. I had a moment of panic last night where I was about to run in the opposite direction of what is playing out in my life. There is nothing set in stone as of yet but life has differently surprised me.

So what does all of this mean for my writing career? Right now, I feel like I am going to have to put a pause on my writing. The thought makes me cringe and want to cry. I have worked hard to have a writing career and I have had to fight even harder to be able to do this. I have emotions I am dealing with and there are a few things that are up in the air for me. Taking a pause is not the right choice, at least that is how it feels right now. I think what I am going to have to do is push on the nights I have to write. During the next couple weekends I will have to take a break in order to finish what I need to do for my family. Once I am moved and unpack, my life will start fresh and I will be able to create a new writing schedule. My bosses have been saying to all of us that we have to have grace for ourselves during all of this craziness. This is no different. I am still learning how to have grace for myself or as my mom says empathy and sympathy for myself. I tend to push myself harder than I push anyone else. I am more critical of myself as well. It is a lesson I am learning currently.

So give yourself a break. Accept that sometimes life is going to affect your writing schedule no matter how hard you try to fight it. Have some grace for yourself when things seem to be rapidly changing in your life. We all have moments where our lives go through dramatic changes; some we set in motion, others happen because the powers that be set them in motion for us. Until next time!

The balance I have been trying to find seems to have found me. I have been struggling for months trying to figure out how to balance my writing with my personal life. It has been a difficult journey but I am feeling like the balance has found me. So for that reason this blog post is going to be all about writing. A couple weeks ago I wrote a blog post for those who are aspiring to be authors. This one is more for we seasoned authors who from time to time feel like they should give up writing.

The first bit of advice is we all at some point feel like giving up. We all have slumps, times when we feel like the pushing we do day in and day out is not enough. It is in some ways part of being a writer. As an indie author it is up to us to not only write, edit, and publish our books but we also have to find ways to advertise regularly. We have to think of new ways to market ourselves, if we will be attending any book events for the year. We have to learn how to make graphics, what swag we need to either make or buy and so much more. It becomes more than any of us can bear sometimes. So how do we fight the self doubt? How do we stay positive when it feels like we are failing at our dream? The answer is you need to have a support team. Your team should be made up of people who are encouraging and you can trust. It should be people who know how to cheer you up at the worst of times. People who know when you need a break or a drink or maybe just a laugh. Those are the people who will remind you why you are an author. They are the people who will keep you upbeat and smiling. For me, my team is made up of people I know personally and people I only know through social media. One of my biggest cheerleaders is my friend Betty. She is a woman I have never met in person but is one of the most wonderful people I know. She is encouraging, makes me laugh, and anytime I am second guessing myself she reminds me I am a badass and I can do this. My other cheerleader is Amanda and all of my ARC readers. They are amazing and are supportive of everything I do. I also have a few author friends, one of them being my friend L.E. Martin. She is my partner on Penned in Magic and Forevers. In some ways, she is my partner in crime when it comes to social media. We support each other, we try to encourage one another, and when needed, we let one another vent. As you all know my mom edits everything I write. She is also the person I talk through scenes with and reminds me who I do this for. There are times I forget why I work so hard. She reminds me. I have a couple of new team members. The first is my friend Matt. He is the individual who I plan on working with on my poetry book. I send him poems when I am unsure if they are good enough. I talk to him about my uncertainties and music. His taste in music is very similar to mine. I am grateful to call him my friend. The last but certainly not the least is Kyle. He is a friend of mine who makes me laugh and I can talk to him about anything, and is a big goofball. One of the reasons he and I get along so well is as he puts it our insanity matches up to one another. It is also why he is one of my team members.

The next piece of advice I have is to make sure you always support other authors. In many ways we authors live in our own world. Recently, I have been hearing about authors who have bullied other authors. Others who have plagiarized from other authors. One of my good friends had it happen to her months back and her first thought was maybe she and her writing partner should stop writing all together. Sometimes those moments make you want to stop being part of this world. The way I see it is quitting won’t make our world any better. The only way to shut down the negative individuals is to drown them out by supporting one another. The more support you can give to other authors the quieter the negative individuals will get. Make sure you review their books, cheer them on, and if possible help advertise their books.

The last piece of advice is what I said to aspiring authors, keep going. Push through the difficult times and remember why you became a writer. Life as an artist is not for the faint of heart. You have to be strong willed, determined, and believe in what you are doing. Until next time!

This week was a productive week in terms of writing. I didn’t do as much with Savannah as I had planned but I was able to get some new poetry written and I have secured an artist to team up with. My friend Matt will be doing the artwork for this new adventure and the really exciting part is that we will be sitting down to start talking about what we both want for this book. I have been writing more poetry this week than usual and I am starting to really enjoy what I am creating. Some of it will need some work and I will be changing some of the language. Other pieces will probably not make it into the book and I am fully aware of it. The goal of this book is to not only showcase poetry but art with it. There is even a chance he and I will create some poetry together. When we sit down to talk about what we want, we both will have a better idea of what to expect from each other.

While taking the next step to start this new book, I am also getting close to the end of Book Six. I have been feeling the pressure to finish this book so I am able to edit and correct the area I feel needs the most work. My goal is to finish the book in the next two weeks, which means I need to start working more on completing it. The big win this week was completing an important scene for the book I have been struggling with. It took a conversation with another author friend in order to see how to make the scene what it needs to be. I learned a lot from my friend and was able to create a better scene and how the book will end. That was a huge relief off my shoulders.

I also am trying to get back on track with my editing of book four. The changes in my life have created complications to my deadlines I have set. It is an issue that I am trying to deal with and it is starting to look as if the release of book four will be delayed a month or more. I want to release the absolutely best book I am capable of and in order to do so means I need to take care of some issues in my personal life first and then I will be able to turn to what I need to do for Savannah’s next book.

There are moments like this where I feel like I do not have enough hours within my day. I have been trying to get back on track with editing and writing through my week and I am still struggling to find the time and energy to do what I need to for my writing. I have been saying for months that COVID ruins everything. This is one of those times I feel it the strongest. Covid has changed how I do my day job as a whole. I am working in a new way and I am trying to find new ways to keep my students engaged. There are no breaks as I had before from a student and I have more responsibility than ever because I am working inside a gen ed classroom instead of the special needs classroom. We are not allowed to change classrooms or move around the school freely as we once were allowed to. All this means I have to be over prepared daily for anything my students can throw at me. I also have to think outside of the box like I have never done before. All of this takes time and energy I would normally not have to use. What I am realizing is that any time I get any form of writing done it is a win. I still have my goals for the week but I am having to adjust them from time to time based on the week I am having and what is happening in my work week. I am finding more grace for myself than I ever have before. I have been working nonstop to change my life and improve it overall. I have been working towards a brighter future, which has forced me to slow down on my writing but not stop completely. The fact that I have had to slow down sucks. There is no other word for it but as the next stage of my life starts in a matter of weeks that means I will be able to find more time to write and edit. I am slowly adjusting to a new way of doing my day job as I do so it means I will start to have more energy as a whole.

So take time if you need it. See all of your progress as a win. Don’t stop no matter how much you want to or feel like giving up. Every step forward is a win. You may have to do as I have done, adjust your goals weekly. Eventually a new balance will be found and you will reach your end goal. It may mean dates have to be pushed back but it is not the end of the world. Until next time.

Tonight I had the pleasure of doing a live Q&A. It is one of my favorite things to do because I get to talk about writing or more specifically my writing. Maybe that makes me sound vain but that’s okay because I love what I do. I get to talk about Savannah and what is to come. What makes her tick and of course all the other characters. Tonight I was asked a question I never get asked. Every author I have ever read or have known personally has gotten the question: what is your advice for aspiring authors. It was exciting to finally get that question. It felt like I have finally made it as an author. Maybe I’m weird or crazy or it is just wishful thinking on my part but that is the way it feels. So the blog for this week is going to be about my advice to aspiring authors. Some of it will be things that others have said others not so much. So here we go!

The first piece of advice is to write everyday. It can be for five minutes or an hour. It doesn’t matter the time you spend on writing, the point is to write. Write everyday until it becomes a habit. Write when you do not want to or you do not know what to write. Just write. When you make it a habit, writing comes easier as a whole. You will have times when you do not want to write because you have writer’s block or you are having trouble with a scene but when you make it a habit it becomes easier to work through those issues. Even when you hit difficult times in life you will be able to escape into your writing.

The next piece of advice is to read. Do not just read one genre or one author, read everything. You will learn from other authors about different styles of writing. You will learn different techniques for descriptions, word usage, eteceta. There is so much to learn from other authors. There is also a moment when you are reading a book and there is a description that takes your breath away. For me it was a sentence, one sentence by Michael Connelly. It was so beautifully written that I stopped reading and said I want to write like that. Since that moment I have strived to be that good. This leads us to the next piece of advice I have.

Strive for greatness. I read a post from an author who was complaining about having to sell books against authors like J.R.R. Tolkin. She was complaining that it is impossible to compete with a dead author. My take on it is you should want to compete against great authors like J.R.R. Tolkin. You should want to compete against the Michael Connelly’s in the world of writing because they are the best. Anything you do in life you should strive to be the best. Being mediocre is never okay in my book. This also goes with the advice of writing everyday. When you write everyday your writing improves.

The next piece of advice is do not listen to the critics. You will never make everyone happy. All you can do is make yourself happy. If you are happy with your story that is all that matters. J.R. Ward gave great advice to authors several months ago. She said “Reviews are readers business not author business.” She is correct, so do not read reviews or what a critic has to say because at the end of the day if you do not like what you write neither will anyone else. The joy you feel when you write will always come through in what you are doing.

The last piece of advice is something many would disagree with me on. Many times you hear authors say look at what is selling or what is popular. I disagree with this. Write the story you want to read. Do not worry about what is popular or what is the “In Thing”. Write what you enjoy. Again if you are writing what others want you to write the joy will not be there. The writing will be boring and flat. Be you, do you.

For now that’s all I have to say on the topic. Until next time!

This week I have spent my time trying to form a new schedule for my work week. I am finally finding a routine that works until I move and have my own space once more. It has been a challenge to get any writing accomplished just because I have not been going to work for the last five months. At this point we don’t know how long schools will be open but I am hoping we make it longer than a few weeks. The bright side is I have gotten a few chapters done and I am writing most days. I am starting to realize that at this point I am having to show myself some form of grace. My life right now is a bag of chaos or that’s how it feels. I am writing but not as much as I want to. I am doing some editing but again not as much as I want. The thing I am having to adjust is my goals for the week. The goal currently for the week is seven pages. It’s not much but it is greater than zero. Between the potential of another shut down, gearing up to move, and karate I am feeling pretty good with a goal of seven pages a week.

I am not just working on book six but I have also been working once more on my poetry. I have been talking with a friend about doing the artwork for the book. It has made me want to go forward with my vision for the book. I am excited about what it will look like when it is done. As a writer I look at the poetry I am writing as adding to my goal. If I can get seven pages with Savannah done and three poems a week written then I am winning in terms of accomplishments for the week.

The issue I face is that I hold myself to a higher standard than that. So seven pages doesn’t feel good enough. Three poems is not enough. I should make more time to get edits done. These are the things that run through my head in my down time. I have to learn to have more forgiveness and grace for myself than I currently do. I guess the question for this week is how do you learn to be less hard on yourself?

I am unsure I am equipped to answer this question. I have high standards for myself. I expect that I should be able to handle more than I am currently. Yes, I have a number of changes happening. I have a few uncertainties in my life just as everyone else does at this point. The issue I have is I expect that I can plan a better schedule and do more than I am currently. I can feel the desire and in some ways the need to do more and yet I struggle to get more done. So what do I do with that feeling? The only thing I can do is remind myself that at least I am meeting my weekly goal. Most weeks I am doing more than that. It may not be all that I want but it is still better than not at all. There are two days a week that I just can’t get writing done. Those are karate nights for my kids. I go from work to karate on those two nights and I am there for a couple of hours. By the time I get done with my day job and karate I am done mentally. Those nights are the nights I kick myself the most. I am then forced to remind myself that I will do more writing the next day. It takes me reminding myself regularly that I am doing all that I can at this point. In a matter of weeks I will be moving. Once I move things will settle down and I can rework my schedule to one that allows me to get more writing done overall.

So give yourself a break and try to look at the positive. I may not get as much writing as I want to get done but I am moving forward. Within the next couple of months I will be back to where I was months ago. I will be starting my audiobook with any luck. Hopefully, my poetry book will be coming to a completion. Until next time!

With the start of school within the next two weeks, I am starting to return to my day job. There is a part of me that is grateful. I have missed my day job and my students. I have missed being able to work with them. My year will look very different compared to last year. It will be filled with more responsibility, more challenges, and a bigger chance for burn out. This all means I have gone into prep mode. I have spent my first week back at work trying to prepare for anything and everything. I have to try to find enough work, games, and rewards for my student. I have had to plan for the worse cases scenario and with a special needs kid that can be difficult. I have even had to look at how to deal with any behavioral issues. The way I would normally handle them, I can’t due to covid restrictions within the school.

All of this means I have spent my week on my day job and not as much on writing. I am trying to get back into the swing of things of getting up at four thirty, working out, writing, doing my social media, and going to work. The problem is, it is difficult to do that when you haven’t had to in five months. I am finding it rather difficult to get up on time and get everything done before I head to work. I am sure that it will get easier but right now I am feeling like it is impossible. The bright side of all of this is I am starting to feel like I am finding my footing with the writing I am doing. I am starting to see where the book is going, which makes life so much easier when I do sit down and write. It is making me hopeful for this book. There are still moments that I want to start over on book 6. I was talking to an author friend about the struggles I am feeling with writing for the last several months. I have realized a few things that I have done wrong. The first is I didn’t take a week off before starting this book. Normally, I take time off to rest, almost like a mental vacation, instead I jumped into this book because I was drowning in my emotions.

The other misstep was I should have moved over to my other series. It would have given me time to process a few things about The Hellborn Series and seen my path more clearly. The last thing came from my friend, Tim. I was telling him how much I was struggling to finish this book. There are parts of it that are very good. The writing is spot on and we are learning more about other characters. With that said, there is a lot that needs work and I want to throw the book away and start over. Tim reminded me of my own advice when I was talking to him. Just keep writing. Keep going until the book is finished. Once it is done you can go back and fix all of the issues within the book. He is right and it is the same thing I have told all of you. I just needed the reminder that it will all be fine once I get the book finished and I start editing it. Editing is a task we all bitch about but in some ways it is therapeutic. It is how we right all of our wrongs and missteps. It is how we take something that may be ugly and make it beautiful.

So I am going to keep this blog short this week. I am hoping to get some writing done before I start my work week. Don’t be afraid of taking time to reflect on where you may have gone wrong. Embrace your mistakes and learn from them. Keep pushing until you get to the end and then you can fix your mistakes. Until next time!

I did something I have never done in my writing career this past week, I took an entire week off from writing. This was not intentionally done but my life is still going through major changes and there just didn’t seem to be enough hours in the day for me to get my writing done. As you all know my mom moved out to Colorado about a month ago. She and I have been sharing the living room during this time. We have reached a point where things need to change. We cannot continue to live as we are. She just started her new job and it made us realize that it was time to make another change. This past week we rented an apartment that will be ready in October to move into. We spent the week figuring out what our next step was, could we qualify, and then making the decision if we move forward.

I also went back to my day job or a version of my day job. My school district started a jumpstart program for all the special needs kids to get them back into the swing of going to school and being around other kids. It was a two hour program and I am grateful I took part in it because truthfully I needed it just as much as they did. I have not been doing any in person learning for five months. Everything has been online, which has meant I didn’t have to get up as early as I normally would, I could go walk every morning and I could set a different schedule for myself and my kids. Adjusting to my old schedule has taken a toll on me but I am finally starting to feel good about it.

To top off this big move we have made for our future and my kids’ future, I have been dealing with matters of the heart. Whether I like to admit it or not I fell for a man that unfortunately did not have the courage to move forward with me. There have been a lot of questions about this particular situation and where it would go for the past few months. I am not necessarily a girl that is sunshine and roses nor do I always have a lot of faith in love but this time was different for me. This was someone who truly saw the real me and liked it. The downside is that love did not win this particular battle. It hurts more than I care to admit because this person was special to me. On the upside, I found the answers I have been looking for for the past few months. It has made it easier to move forward with what is next for me.

Taking the week off freaked me out a bit. I have been struggling with this book to begin with and not achieving anything was hard for me to swallow. What I didn’t realize is that I needed to take the week. It has given me time to think about what I am doing with this book. I needed the time to process what was next. I needed the time to adjust to a new way of living. We, as humans, adapt all the time to change but sometimes it takes a moment. It is not something that happens over night. I needed to adjust to my old schedule once more, the fact that my life seems to be changing indefinitely (that’s how it feels anyways), and to finally getting the answers I have been waiting for. All of this has affected my writing over the past several weeks. Today as I sat drafting for the first time in seven days I felt more like I used to feel as I worked. I found it easier to find the words I was looking for. I only did a few pages but a few pages are still greater than zero. The week I took allowed me to get my head wrapped around what I needed to do next. Sometimes we need to take time to get perspective. Many times we feel the need to just keep pushing. Keep going and don’t stop. It is how I usually do things. What I really needed was time off. I needed the time to process all the worry, sadness, and fear I have been feeling because at the end of the day it was all eating away at me. I still have worries and fears but I am handling them better.

When life becomes more than you feel you can handle, take time to check on yourself. Make the effort to provide yourself with self care. I am still learning that self care is a necessity in life. It is how we keep going and feel good about ourselves. Make sure you are doing for you just as you are for others. Until next time!

Let’s talk a little bit more about writing. As you all know I have been working on book six for several months now. I have been struggling with this book and I don’t know why, or at least didn’t until yesterday.

I was talking with a friend about my books. He has never read them and we were talking about the difference in our arts. He plays guitar and is in a band. For him all of his art is performing in front of a crowd of people. For me most of the time, I’m sitting behind my computer and creating. I don’t generally have a live audience unless I am doing a live read on Facebook. We were talking about this and other parts writing as a whole. I pointed out that I am almost done with Savannah and Santiago’s books. I have two books to write and their story is done. When I said this a sadness washed over me. Now originally, I thought the sadness had to do with how much I have struggled writing book six, it has been like pulling teeth to get this book finished. Savannah has not been easy to work with. She has almost been stubborn to the point that I want to throw my computer because she doesn’t want to work. I have also been going through a few things, which have clouded my thought process. Covid-19 has not been helpful because I am trying to do my job and teach my kids. Yesterday during this conversation with my friend it hit me what was really wrong. Yes, the writing has been bad in many ways and I have felt lost but it had nothing to do with life or Covid-19. It all has to do with the fact that I am realizing Savannah and I are almost done. I have learned so much from Savannah. In many ways, Savannah saved my life by waking me up from the dread I was living in. She and I have grown together in many ways. Knowing I am almost done with her books feels like my friend is leaving me. What am I supposed to do without my daily dose of Savannah? What am I to do with me as a writer? I am in mourning, I realized. I am mourning Savannah and all of her people. It is a painful and scary thought that I am done. I have plans of a few books for other characters where Savannah and Santiago will be present but for the most part we will see very little of them. I also have another series planned. The series is set in the Hellborn World but in different cities. Savannah and Santiago will never be seen in that series. This is it for them and I am heartbroken in many ways.

I guess the question is what do I do? How do I soften the sadness I feel at finishing this series? I’m not sure I know how. I have been thinking about this for the last twenty-four hours and I have not found the answer. Part of me wishes I had switched to the other series. I could have gone and spent some time working with my demons and given Savannah a break. As I type, I am realizing I should have done just that. Savannah and I have been working non-stop for two years. Taking a break would have given us the break we both needed and given me time to mourn instead of doing so while I was writing the book. It would also ensure I had a starting point for the other series. I could have eased into the demon books.

The other step I could have taken was accepting how I was feeling. There is a sense of accomplishment with the completion of each book. There is an even bigger accomplishment at the fact I have finished five books. With that accomplishment comes the sadness that I am almost done with The Hellborn Series. If I had taken the time to look at how I was actually feeling about this I would have dealt with my emotions better. I would have allowed myself to mourn my loss a little more. I guess the question is what do I do now?

The answer is simple yet difficult. I need to deal with my sense of loss and finish book six. The rest of this book is not going to be easy to finish but it’s time to do it, so I can start moving on. I need to accept that Savannah isn’t really leaving me; she is just taking a break. There may be more books down the road or for all I know one of my demons may step into Savannah’s world. I don’t foresee that happening but I also have no clue where the demons will take me. Once I finish book six, I plan to take a break and start working on my other series. Taking a few months off from Savannah and Santiago will help me deal with what I am feeling, which will help finish the series. I also think Savannah is feeling some of the same emotions I am feeling. Maybe she needs the break from me just as much. Once she and I take a small break, I believe we will find the success we have always known. For now that is all the wisdom I have to offer. Until next time!

This week was a bit of a trial. I made good use of my desk and my writing is coming back. The quality and the quantity are both growing. This excites me because I am beginning to find my way back to my writing. It also means I feel less like I am letting Savannah down. It also means I am starting to think about my future projects that I am going to be working on starting next year. One of those projects I have been talking about is starting a YouTube page. The page would feature live reads, Q&A’s and book trailers. There would also be videos of me being me, which can be funny and over the top at times which I can be. The vision I have for it would be more than just me. I would want my friend and partner in the author world to take this leap with me. It could be profitable for both of us. Right now, the YouTube page is just a thought and it will take me a year to actually get everything together in order to launch it. It is an exciting prospect but one I want to do.

I am still doing my online training. The goal is to complete the training before school starts. The issue is I only seem to be able to get through two videos a day. With the supposed start of the new school year has brought some uncertainty as to what my job will entail. The plan as it stands now is a lot more than I normally do and I do quite a bit in my day to day job as it is. The thing is with my day job is it is never the same two days in a row, it is one of the things I love about my job. It is also what will make my new responsibilities much more difficult. I can feel the stress of the entire situation as it builds inside of me. The stress begins to take a toll on me. The first sign of the stress I am feeling is that I am having issues sleeping again. Maybe it’s still I’m not quite sure. I am also having issues focusing on one task at a time. I find myself trying to do multiple tasks at once because I feel like I just do not have enough hours in the day to get everything done. Eventually the stress will begin to affect other parts of my life but for now it is not.

With all this uncertainty around all of us I know I am not the only one feeling stressed out. At this point the stress of it makes me feel like I am being crushed alive. So what do you do?

For me I have started adding to my workout. I have started riding my bike again, which has its upside to it. I enjoy being on my bike because I like to go fast and I find it fun. In some ways it makes me feel like a kid again. The downside is I tend to push myself a little too hard and after thirty minutes I have a difficult time walking. The end result though is there feels less stress. The other thing I have started doing is I have started going out more. One of the things I have been doing is going to a restaurant that has live music. It’s a mellow place where I can chill and enjoy different types of music each week. Sitting listening to music is one of my favorite things to do. For me music is as important as breathing. It is a piece of my soul and I need it everyday. When I don’t get enough music I feel like screaming and my irritation through the day grows. My need for music has gotten so bad that my twelve year old has decided she hates going to the store with me because of the fact that I will start singing songs like “I Want To Know What Love Is” in the store. Don’t worry I make sure I sing the song over the top as it is meant to be sung. The last thing I have been doing is visiting the pool at night. I like going and enjoying the pool when most people are not there. It is relaxing and I get the hot tube to myself. That in and of itself is a win in my book.

With so much uncertainty in our world it is important to find ways to find a piece of happiness and a way to relieve the stress. If you don’t it will begin to wear you down in more ways than one. Find the thing that helps you keep going. Find what helps you laugh and sing and dance through these difficult times. Until next time.