Humor Quotations Quotes (35 quotes)

“Women never stalk men; they just research them intensely.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: courtship-quotes, dating-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, life-quotations, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, relationship-advice-for-men, relationship-advice-for-women, relationship-quotes, stalking, stalking-women, women-quotes

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“A mother’s eyes are like God; impossible to get away from, they see everything.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“The easiest way to remember your future wife’s birthday is to marry her on Super Bowl Sunday.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: birthday-quotes, boyfriend-and-girlfriend, boyfriend-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, girlfriend-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humorous-quote, humorous-quotes, husband-quotes, life-lesson-quotes, life-lessons-quotes, life-quotations, life-quote, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, life-quotes-inspirational-quotes, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, marriage-quotes, romance-quotes, super-bowl, sweet-romance, wife-quotes

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“Falling in love with someone is intentional, even if it was their looks that tripped you.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“Love came, it saw, and it conquered me.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“Get high on love, not drugs.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: cocain-quotes, cocaine, drug, drugs, falling-in-love-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humorous-quote, humorous-quotes, life-lesson-quotes, life-lessons-quotations, life-lessons-quotes, life-quotations, life-quote, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, life-quotes-inspirational-quotes, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, lovers-quotes, matshona-dhliwayo-quotes, t-shirt-quote, t-shirt-quotes, weed-quotes

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“A kiss is the only thing you can throw at someone without being held criminally responsible.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: anger-quotes, angry-quotes, boyfriend-and-girlfriend, boyfriend-quotes, courtship-quotes, criminal, dating-quotes, fight-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quotes, girlfriend-quotes, hate-quotes, humor-inspirational, humor-quotations, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humorous-quotes, husband-quotes, kiss-quotes, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, marriage-quotes, relationship-advice-for-men, relationship-advice-for-women, relationship-advice-quote, relationship-advice-quotes, relationship-quotes, spouse-quotes, wedding-quotes, wife-quotes

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“The only time I hold my wife's hand tightly is when my wallet is in her other hand.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“Love turns men into boys; heartache turns boys into men.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: boys, courtship-quotes, dating-quotes, falling-in-love-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, girls-quotes, heart-quotations, heart-quote, heart-quotes, heartache-quotes, heartbreak-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humourous-quotes, life-lesson-quotes, life-lessons-quotes, life-quotations, life-quote, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, life-quotes-inspirational-quotes, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, lovers-quotes, men-quotes, pain-quotes, relationship-advice-for-men, relationship-advice-for-women, relationship-advice-quotes, relationship-quotes, romance-quotes, sweet-romance, woman-quotations, woman-quotes, women-quotes

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“There is nothing wrong with being a puppet if love is the one pulling the strings.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: courtship-quotes, dating-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humorous-quotes, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, relationship-advice-quotes, relationship-quotes

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“Two things are infinite; a woman’s patience and her husband’s mistakes.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“Your wife is smarter than you; know this, and you will live happily ever after.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: boyfriend-and-girlfriend, boyfriend-quotes, courtship-quotes, dating-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, girlfriend-quotes, happily-ever-after, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, life-lesson-quotes, life-lessons-quotations, life-lessons-quote, life-lessons-quotes, life-quotations, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, life-quotes-inspirational-quotes, live-quotes, love-quotes, lovers-quotes, marriage-quotes, relationship-advice-for-men, relationship-advice-for-women, relationship-advice-quotes, relationship-quotes, smart-quotes, smarter-quotes, wedding-quotes, wife-quotes

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“Ask your wife for forgiveness, even when you’re right.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“My mother-in-law belongs in Hell, but the devil is afraid she’ll end up taking over.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: devil-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quotes, hell-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, husband-quotes, marriage-quotes, mother-in-law, mother-in-laws, relationship-quotes, spouse-quotes, wife-quotes

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“Love is my favorite drug; I overdose on it regularly.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“An inch to a man’s heart is a mile to his wallet.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“An angry wife can be more frightening than an army of disgruntled soldiers.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“I'm not lazy, I'm just saving my energy for dinner.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: humor-quotations, humor-quotes, hunger-quotations, hunger-quotes, jokes-quotes, lazy-quotes, matshona-dhliwayo-quotes, motivation-quotes, motivational-quotations, motivational-quotes

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“Women are the best thieves you will ever meet; they steal your heart and your last name, but never get to spend the night in jail.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“Love is a hook; the moment a man swallows it, a woman knows she has him forever.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: boyfriend-and-girlfriend, boyfriend-quotes, courtship-quotes, dating-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quotes, girlfriend-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humorous-quote, humourous-quotes, husband-quotes, life-lesson-quotes, life-lessons-quotes, life-quotations, life-quote, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, life-quotes-inspirational-quotes, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, marriage-quotes, relationship-advice-for-men, relationship-advice-for-women, relationship-advice-quotes, relationship-quotes, wedding-quotes, wife-quotes, woman-quotations, woman-quotes

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“Be calm on your wedding day; she won’t kill you in front of a hundred people, no matter what you've done.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“Boys are raw materials that women manufacture into products called men.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“If men could be bought like clothes at an outlet, only then would women always get what they bargained for.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: boyfriend-quotes, courtship-quotes, dating-quotes, falling-in-love-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, girlfriend-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humorous-quotes, humourous-quote, husband-quotes, life-lesson-quotes, life-lessons-quotes, life-quotations, life-quote, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, life-quotes-inspirational-quotes, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, lovers-quotes, marriage-quotes, men-quotes, money-quotes, relationship-advice-for-women, relationship-quotes, romance-quotes, sweet-romance, wife-quotes, woman-quotations, woman-quotes, women-quotes

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“She complains that I'm lazy, but I just like to save my energy for dinner.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: dinner, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, humorous-quotation, humorous-quotations, humorous-quote, humorous-quotes, husband-quotes, joke, lazy-quotes, marriage-quotes, relationship-quotes, wife-quotes

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“Women make the world go round; men turn it upside down.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humorous-quotes, man-quotes, men-quotes, woman-quotations, woman-quotes, women-quotes, world-quotes

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“The easiest way to be the prettiest girl at a party is to rig the guest list.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, girl-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, humorous-quotations, humorous-quote, humorous-quotes, party, pretty-quote, woman-quotations, woman-quotes

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“If God had a wife, He would be in trouble too if He dodged His chores.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

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“Be calm when your wife yells at you, calmer when she chastens you, but be terrified when she ignores you.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: boyfriend-and-girlfriend, boyfriend-quotes, calm-quotes, chastise, falling-in-love-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, humorous-quotation, humorous-quotations, humorous-quote, humorous-quotes, ignore-quotes, life-lesson-quotes, life-lessons-quotations, life-lessons-quote, life-lessons-quotes, life-quotations, life-quote, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, lovers-quotes, marital-advice, marital-issues, marital-problems, marriage-quotes, relationship-advice-for-men, relationship-advice-quotes, relationship-quotes, spouse-quotes, wife-quotes

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“The world’s most lethal venom is not found on the tongues of serpents, but on the tongues of a disgruntled wife.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: anger-quotes, angry-quotes, funny-quotations, funny-quote, funny-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, husband-quotes, life-lesson-quotes, life-lessons-quotations, life-lessons-quotes, life-quotations, life-quote, life-quotes, life-quotes-and-sayings, life-quotes-inspirational-quotes, love-quotations, love-quote, love-quotes, love-quotes-and-saying, love-quotes-and-sayings, love-quotes-for-everybody, love-quotes-love, marital-advice, marital-problems, marriage-quotes, marry-quotes, matshona-dhliwayo-quotes, rage-quotes, relationship-advice-for-men, relationship-advice-quotes, relationship-quotes, spouse-quotes, wife-quotes, wrath

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“If you want God to laugh, tell Him you've found Him a wife.”
― Matshona Dhliwayo

tags: god-quotes, humor-quotations, humor-quote, humor-quotes, laugh-quotes, laughter-quotes, matshona-dhliwayo-quotes, wife-quotes

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