Ph_ilip

“I have it on very good authority that I have a lovely pee-pee, so lay off.”
― Eoin Colfer, Plugged

“Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.”
― Saeed Sikiru, Funny Quotes: 560 Humorous Sayings that Will Keep You Laughing Even After Reading Them

“One evening an old Cherokee Indian told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, “My son, the battle is between two ‘wolves’ inside us all. One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.” The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: “Which wolf wins?” The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
― David Archer, Code Name Camelot

“Triaminotrinitrobenzene”
― David Archer, In Sheep's Clothing