Heather

“For all I know, some of my close friends could be dead. The only way to find out would be to call them up and talk to them about what's going on in their lives, and I never do that.

I think this is true of many guys, even the ones who are not Humor Personalities: we do not view talking about our personal lives as an acceptable activity.”
― Dave Barry, Lessons From Lucy: The Simple Joys of an Old, Happy Dog

“Homework strongly indicates that the teachers are not doing their jobs well enough during the school day. It's not like they'll let you bring your home stuff to school and work on it there. You can't say, 'I didn't finish sleeping at home, so I have to work on finishing my sleep here.”
― Jim Benton, Nobody's Perfect. I'm as Close as It Gets

“The Boov frowned. 'Everybodies always is wanting to make a clone for to doing their work. If you are not wanting to do your work, why would a clone of you want to do your work?”
― Adam Rex, The True Meaning of Smekday

“If the monkey really wanted to get the weasel, he would’ve stopped wasting time and burned down the mulberry bush.”
― M.E. Castle, Cloneward Bound: The Clone Chronicles #2