SammiSue > Recent Status Updates

This book has insta-love.....except it seems cheap to call it that. Maybe love at first site? Insta-love done correctly? Idk, but this book is speaking to my grumpy inner sap and I like it.

Also, magic. Yum.

.....fitted out his new home with furniture, books, and a computer. Apropos the latter, Lady Glory had impressed upon him the importance of caution when using it, in case he got ‘the wrong idea’ about humanity.

The Ranger respected her judgement enormously, and only ever used his computer for looking at porn.

Haha! Nailed it.

“The human chasing you—who was he?”

“Just a guy,” Gonzalo said, kicking the corpse.
“Mister Lifechoices, first name Myshitty.”

“Gag me now,” I moaned as I scrawled my name on the RSVP line and checked the box for “Regretfully decline.” I wished there had been a box that said Joyfully declines.

Does it make me a spiteful asshole if I've held an invitation in my hand and thought about the same thing? Or just hilarious? I'm going with the latter.

Sure, he scowled a lot and his resting bitch face was more of a don’t-fucking-speak-to-me face,


Lol, same thing right?

“That’s it?” His eyes glinted. “You’re a cheap date, you know that?”

That surprised a laugh out of him. “Don’t say that till you find out what I order for dinner.”

His grandmother used to say that you have more to fear from a chicken than a dog. Chickens were the harmless people in your life, the ones you thought liked you. The dog, he growled and showed his teeth. You knew to watch out for a dog.

“One-thirty over eighty-five. That’s a bit high. If I keep seeing numbers like that, you are going on a low-sodium diet. You should be cutting down on your caffeine as it is.”

“If you take away my caffeine, I will switch to hard drugs. I’m serious. It’s either coffee or cocaine.”

“You keep this one too. I just wanted to make sure it tasted okay, or I would’ve had to risk a fatal injury and smack it out of your hand before you could eat it.”

“I like how you think that throwing it on the floor would somehow prevent me from eating chocolate,” I retorted.


I know it seems like I'm highlighting every other sentence from these books, but I just can't help it, it's funny!

“Cari, the gods don’t lead us. They give us someone to swear at when we stub our toe or thank them when there’s an onion ring in our french fries. But lead us? You’d be better off looking for someone you respect and following their example.”

“Where are we?” Malone gurgled. “Is that… opium?”

“Those are flowers,” I corrected, then muttered under my breath at the surrounding poppy fields. “That can be turned into opium. Maybe. I don’t know. And if you’re smart, you don’t ask.”

“Stalker rules or your rules?”Ryder quipped.

“Common fricking sense rules. Don’t stick your nose into somebody else’s business. You get to keep your nose longer,” I replied.

“Because people don’t look into their neighbor’s bowl to see if he’s got enough food,” I answered. “They look to see if that asshole has more. Greed is easy. Sharing’s hard. It’s why parents have to teach that instead of not hoarding shit. We’re all hardwired for self-preservation.”

I knew less than nothing about how the sidhe said hello, other than it sometimes devolved into a list of clans, houses, and maybe even what they ate for dinner the night before.

Hah! That's hilarious. And spot on to the thoughts crossing my mind whilst visiting the Spanish parts of my family sometimes.

As much as I didn’t like dangling from the prismatic’s teeth like a tree-hugging daisy-humper’s beard bead,

Beard bead? Lol, say that 3 times fast. I just spit tea on my Kindle. That is quite the description. 🙃🤭

“Can I come over?” Liam asks, once he’s already buckling himself up in the passenger seat.

They really fucking exaggerate Canadian politeness.


They do?!? I refuse to believe that! *Pouts*