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Lundy Bancroft

“This “gentle man” style of abuser tends to be highly self-centered and demanding of emotional catering. He may not be the man who has a fit because dinner is late but rather erupts because of some way his partner failed to sacrifice her own needs or interests to keep him content. He plays up how fragile he is to divert attention from the swath of destruction he leaves behind him.”

Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
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Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft
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